30m Contest

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Joshua_mybb_import21010

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Seeming as I'm giving my pure away, I decided to host a contest. (Quitting Runescape but not RG)

1st prize: 15m
2nd prize: 10m
3rd price: 5m

This will be an opinionated contest
Post any joke under 50 words (whether it be your own, or taken from another source. Not including RG) and the 3 funniest shall be awarded 1st, 2nd and 3rd place.

Good luck to all participants
 
Women's rights.


ill take my 15m now
 
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
 
What does a green fish smell like?
A green fish.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
Because she was hit by a bus

Knock knock
*Who's there?*
Not Sally.
 
How do you stop a Mexican tank?







Shoot the people pushing it.
 
What do you call a black person on a stick?

Shit on a stick

What do you call a black priest?

Holy Shit
 
Mother and father had twins, a pesimist and optimist. For christmas they decided the pesimist to get a horsey and the optimist horse shit. Christmas morning: Pesimist is crying:i wanted a black one, this one is grey, i wanted it to be real and it's wooden...
optimist with a surprised tone: And i got a real one, but i went somewhere!!
(63) i'm auto denied i suppose, but wanted to post this
 
hey quit with the racial jokes i got tons of black ppl in my family tree, its in my backyard
 
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
 
What do a mole rat and an eagle have in common?







They both live underground, except for the eagle.
 
Bad lucks jokes.
Is immortal, sentenced to life prison.
Gets home schooled, gets bullied.
Goes for prostate exam, wolverine is the nurse.
Sets password as penis, says " not long enough"
 
"What do u say if it's pitch dark in your room and your TV starts to move?
'Drop it, ******.'"

"What do you call a black guy with no arms and legs?
Trustworthy"
 
Where did Jimmy go after he got hit by the bus?

Everywhere.
 
How do you make a Mexican starve to death?
Take all his food.

What's worse than falling to the ground?
The Holocaust.
 
Q. Why are black people good at baseball?
A. They can hit, steal, and run.

A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" the bartender inquires. "I want 6 shots of Jagermeister," responded the young man. "6 shots?!? Are you celebrating something?" "Yeah, my first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a 7th on the house." "No offence, sir. But if 6 shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."
 
'how do you like your eggs in the morning?'
'fertilized?'
 
Alright. The 3 winners have been selected.
In 1st place: Jam (Couldn't stop laughing)
In 2nd place: Mirage (Good jokes there )
In 3rd place: Wubstep (1st joke was hilarious)

Currently in Melbourne, just pm your ig name and I'll add you when I get home (Sunday)

Thanks to all participents, majority of them gave me a laugh.
 
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