post some nasty shit you used to do (or still do) ...
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
melodeathpwns
01-08-2008, 06:03 PM
I clapped my asscheeks in a babies face once. Let's see any of you beat that.
Rapex
01-08-2008, 06:08 PM
post some nasty shit you used to do (or still do) ...
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
You shoved your cousins thongs up your ass? :lmao:
Stoink
01-08-2008, 06:24 PM
I once walked in on my 78 year old grandma undressing... she had just her underwear on
Just thought I would throw that in!
Bicepto
01-08-2008, 06:45 PM
My uncle said not to tell about it...
Papero
01-08-2008, 06:48 PM
I used to make out with a Snow White action figure under my dining room table and did the deed especially when someone was nearby because I thought no one could see me, felt naughty. I got from McDonalds when I was like 5.
TICKLETIME
01-08-2008, 06:59 PM
I drove this girl home from a party and she invited me inside, so im thinking im gonna have a good night. well were making out and she says those words that tell you your 100% in "let me go freshen up" so she goes into the bathroom. After 5 minutes the door opens (the one to the house, it was her mom (shes 18, so you guys dont think im a pedo) and she sends me a text saying "sorry my moms home
we'll finish this another night, sneak out when my moms not looking"
And i was pretty pissed and still had a boner, so i jacked off into her bed and snuck out. she never did end up finishing what she promised.
Oh, this was only a month ago.
emericanlegend
01-08-2008, 07:01 PM
yea once in the sand
Queenbunnywitch
01-08-2008, 09:51 PM
I used to make my barbies have sex. All the time.
Iaretehpwn
01-08-2008, 09:52 PM
I used to lick the bewbies on the barbies. And take a shower with them.
J-nad
01-08-2008, 10:00 PM
My aunt used to have this hot, 20-something year old maid at her house and she always walked around barefoot or in these pink flipflops and they were always dirty due to her using them all the time so I fell in love with her feet.
One day she left with my aunt to do dome errands and I went into her room and licked her flipflops clean. My cock was bursting!
I jacked off while sniffing inside one of her shoes and cummed on the floor. I was 14.
Warka
01-08-2008, 10:07 PM
I would run around the house with my weener out.
Sometimes me and my friend would slap weeners and have weeners fights. Back then it was cool but now that i think about it its pretty nasty.
WayneHead
01-08-2008, 10:08 PM
I tried to quickly beat off while in presence of other hot girls. For example: When i was in the jacuzzi with my friends, Jackie was the hottest of my friend girls, and she looked fuking hot in that bikini she was in. Well she let out a sigh of relaxation that made me have a boner so big i couldn't get rid of it. I had to crouch down lower in that thing. So i tried to beat off, but i couldn't succeed orgasm. I had to sneak out of that jacuzzi with my penis up against my stomache, and i hid the head of the penis with my hand.
Jackie was a friend that i wanted to fuck, but i was too afraid to ask, and plus i was young, and still a virgin that time. I still have contact with her but i didn't hang out with her since last month.
Joeybits
01-08-2008, 10:09 PM
One day i flashed my sisters best friend
She was shocked and appalled, but couldn't look away
WonderFunk
01-08-2008, 10:11 PM
some jackass once clapped his ass in my face when i was about 6 months old.. my parents told me this about a week ago =[
Krippled By Kush
01-08-2008, 10:25 PM
i used to shit on the floor and blame it on the cat, the only thang was that the turd was waaaay too big for a cats ass, my grandma found out quickly.
puppetmasterjjk
01-08-2008, 10:54 PM
Me and my friend used to go pee together.
Queenbunnywitch
01-08-2008, 10:55 PM
lol my cousin has a picture of her taking a shit on the toilet at the same time as my cousin her age, theyre like 2 and have the biggest grins on their faces.
that1guy
01-08-2008, 11:02 PM
i used to go through my sisters underwear drawer...i also used to hide under her bed and watch her get dressed in like second grade.
I played nasty truth or dare with a friend when we were in like third grade.
PantySnatcher
01-08-2008, 11:04 PM
I peed inside my own butt.
SwyfT
01-08-2008, 11:11 PM
I peed inside my own butt.
Why do I want to see that?
Murray_Lips
01-08-2008, 11:15 PM
When I was 12 or so, my buddy jacked off to the gallery on Dead Or Alive 2 on PS2 whilst I cheered him on. We pretty much wanted to see how many times he could ejaculate in the space of an hour.
gatorpatric0
01-08-2008, 11:16 PM
I used to scratch my asshole ALOT.
altect
01-08-2008, 11:18 PM
I used to scratch my asshole ALOT.
thats not perverted. Do you sniff it after?
gatorpatric0
01-08-2008, 11:20 PM
thats not perverted. Do you sniff it after?
Not usually. This was in the past btw...now I know if my asshole itches, I need to go wipe my ass better.
PantySnatcher
01-08-2008, 11:21 PM
Not usually. This was in the past btw...now I know if my asshole itches, I need to go wipe my ass better.
Actually, itchy sphincter occurs when urine runs down through the various crevices and makes contact with the fecal aperture, usually during diarrhea.
I know this because I used to pee inside my own butt.
altect
01-08-2008, 11:23 PM
Not usually. This was in the past btw...now I know if my asshole itches, I need to go wipe my ass better.
oh thats way it smells...:idea:
thebassman
01-09-2008, 01:08 AM
Do you sniff it after?
you dont?
i wallow in my own feces.
Tunes
01-09-2008, 01:13 AM
When i was 4ish me and the other kids at the baby sitters would dry hump..
Thought it was fine at the time, now it seems perverted
J-nad
01-09-2008, 01:22 AM
When I was little I used to put my hand in my ass and smell it. There was something good about the smell.
DaDigits
01-09-2008, 01:25 AM
I honestly can't think of anything I did when I was younger. Maybe that's why I am so perverted now.
altect
01-09-2008, 01:40 AM
When I was little I used to put my hand in my ass and smell it. There was something good about the smell.
i still like that smell, funny thing is i dont like the the smell of other peoples asses
DaDigits
01-09-2008, 01:41 AM
i still like that smell, funny thing is i dont like the the smell of other peoples asses
Its the same as farts for everyone. Your own ass is a stinky smell but its your stink so its not bad.
cust4rd
01-09-2008, 03:47 PM
I clapped my asscheeks in a babies face once. Let's see any of you beat that.
some jackass once clapped his ass in my face when i was about 6 months old.. my parents told me this about a week ago =[
HAAAHAHAHAHHA11
SnAiLz
01-09-2008, 04:04 PM
when i was like 7-8 i would lay face down in the bath (with water ofc) and slide my cock up and down the base of the bath. I didn't masturbate at the time and it never led to a orgasm, it just felt good and i thought i was the only person in the world that could get that feeling :redface:
MashTorrance
01-09-2008, 04:50 PM
When I was like 6 years old, my mom used to babysit this girl in my neighborhood named Ashley. She was about a year younger than I was. One day, we decided to play "doctor" in my room. I was the doctor and she was the patient. I checked her heart beat with a toy stethoscope, then pretended to give her a shot with a toy needle, when all of a sudden she was like "you forgot to check here." She then innocently pulled down her pants/panties like it was nothing. This was my first memory of seeing a live vagina. Being 6 years old, I was like wtf?!?!?! I put the stethoscope up against it for a brief moment, then pulled her pants up. The next day at school I told all my friends that girls had two butts lol.
That and I used to hump basketballs.
melodeathpwns
01-09-2008, 04:58 PM
When I was like 6 years old, my mom used to babysit this girl in my neighborhood named Ashley. She was about a year younger than I was. One day, we decided to play "doctor" in my room. I was the doctor and she was the patient. I checked her heart beat with a toy stethoscope, then pretended to give her a shot with a toy needle, when all of a sudden she was like "you forgot to check here." She then innocently pulled down her pants/panties like it was nothing. This was my first memory of seeing a live vagina. Being 6 years old, I was like wtf?!?!?! I put the stethoscope up against it for a brief moment, then pulled her pants up. The next day at school I told all my friends that girls had two butts lol.
That and I used to hump basketballs.
Oh, thats so fucking hawt. *fap fap fap fap fap fap*
Bidwell
01-09-2008, 07:30 PM
When I was like 6 years old, my mom used to babysit this girl in my neighborhood named Ashley. She was about a year younger than I was. One day, we decided to play "doctor" in my room. I was the doctor and she was the patient. I checked her heart beat with a toy stethoscope, then pretended to give her a shot with a toy needle, when all of a sudden she was like "you forgot to check here." She then innocently pulled down her pants/panties like it was nothing. This was my first memory of seeing a live vagina. Being 6 years old, I was like wtf?!?!?! I put the stethoscope up against it for a brief moment, then pulled her pants up. The next day at school I told all my friends that girls had two butts lol.
That and I used to hump basketballs.
Best final sentence in any post ever. You could rival M. Night Shyamalan in terms of plot twists.
I used to hang on the monkey bars, cross my legs, and flap them back and forth. The subsequent friction was like a really ineffective form of masturbation. Some girl saw me doing it at school once in the second grade, and asked me what I was doing. I didn't want to admit it, so I just told her I was flying using my legs. I covered that shit up smooth.
alexcopane
01-09-2008, 07:58 PM
We had this costa rican nanny when I was probably about 4 years old. I remember sitting on the couch next to her and she started licking my ear like really hardcore. It felt really good, so when she stopped I was like no, don't stop that feels good, and she started up again.
Yuseke
01-09-2008, 08:08 PM
OOH! I got one!
i tried to suck my own dick when i was 10 years old...now my backs all fucked up.. now i have these fucked up stretch marks all over my back. is there any medical procedure to get rid of them???
Faggot
IWinAtLife
01-09-2008, 10:55 PM
When i was about 12, i went to the zoo with my cousin and instead of taking pictures of aniamls, i was taking pictures of upskirts. I was so fucking horny, i spent all my money that my mum gave me on more phtot film just so i can take more upskirt photos. When the photos got developed i was so happy that i had such awesome jack off material. But the photos ended up being shit, they were blurry and too far away. My brother ended up seeing the photos and was like wtf?
Oh yeah, and once when i was 14 i wa so horny one night that i fucked my little brothers toy dinosaur. It was a big fluffy toy and i fucked the shit out of it in a frenzy.
sava
01-10-2008, 07:22 AM
i used to shit on the floor and blame it on the cat, the only thang was that the turd was waaaay too big for a cats ass, my grandma found out quickly.
one of the funniest threads I've read in a long time...:lol:
mince
01-10-2008, 07:30 AM
When we were both 8 years old, me and my cousin used to touch each others penises and balls because we thought it was funny. We also used to take turns making his Dr. Blight action figure do pole dances on our erections. We've never spoken about it as adults.
Dionne
01-10-2008, 08:40 AM
When we were 10, me and my best friend used to grab each others boobs "by accident". It just used to make us laugh, plus she started puberty REALLY early and i think i was facinated by them.
We also used to leave a tape recorder in the bathroom before my grandad used the toilet because he would always fart. Then me and my friend would listen to it in histerics.
I used to draw pictures of people having sex. I was only young and didnt know the full sexual proceedure. I thought that when the penis went inside the vagina, the penis extends (kind of like a collapsable hand-held telescope) and tickles the woman from inside. My mum found my drawings and wondered if i had been drinking her cider. I was 11 years old!
cust4rd
01-15-2008, 02:33 PM
shoved my fingers up in my ass and smelled it
not.
Lologirl
01-15-2008, 02:42 PM
played the "you show me yours, i show you mine" game with the neighborhood boys when we would go swimming. :dunce:
mince
01-15-2008, 02:56 PM
played the "you show me yours, i show you mine" game with the neighborhood boys when we would go swimming. :dunce:
LOL i played that once. Although it was mainly her showing us hers, while we all sat giggling in the shrubs.
OLIAX
01-15-2008, 03:21 PM
I used to grab peoples boobs when I was a toddler
and I still do
mince
01-15-2008, 03:33 PM
Man boobs?
OLIAX
01-15-2008, 03:34 PM
Man boobs?
no dude. :squint:
what the fuck is wrong with you I should smack you upside the head for saying that
lmao
Telaso
01-15-2008, 04:16 PM
no dude. :squint:
what the fuck is wrong with you I should smack you upside the head for saying that
lmao
Man boobs have feelings too!!!!
MrLeft
01-18-2008, 08:28 PM
post some nasty shit you used to do (or still do) ...
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
Why in God's name would anyone be motivated to lick their cousin's dirty thong?
This can't be real.
Wow, and I thought it was bad when my friend told me about this guy he knew who licked his mothers dildo...
The whole dirty underwear thing isn't that far out of the norm...but the cousin thing...that brings it way out their.
and the deepthroating the dildo...hmmm yea, a bit strange too
CorneliusTapas
01-18-2008, 08:31 PM
I clapped my asscheeks in a babies face once. Let's see any of you beat that.
You sir, just made my sig.
SepulSchizo
01-18-2008, 08:44 PM
When I was in the second grade, I saw this older kid doing something strange on the monkey bars. It reminded me of what my uncle used to do around me sometimes. The perverted part about it is that I used to think about it as a teen and masturbate over it.
CorneliusTapas
01-18-2008, 08:49 PM
When I was in the second grade, I saw this older kid doing something strange on the monkey bars. It reminded me of what my uncle used to do around me sometimes. The perverted part about it is that I used to think about it as a teen and masturbate over it.
I see what you did there...:squint:
Ace Jack
01-18-2008, 09:43 PM
post some nasty shit you used to do (or still do) ...
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
Epic.
Boss King > hateonme
jenkem
01-18-2008, 09:54 PM
I play 'you show me yours, I show you mine' game with the girls from the local elementary. I'm 45 years old...
dazevas
02-17-2008, 08:02 PM
i put peanut butter in my balls once and let my gfs dog lick it off.
Jeromiah
02-17-2008, 08:13 PM
when I was younger you know that ball sweat smell when you take a shower, well I would swoop the smell to my noise cause I knida liked the way it smells, and you know when your balls sweat I used to get a nice good sweaty finger and smell it a couple of times. Oh ya and I drink milk out of the container, and i used to beat off and shoot my load in a gold fish pot, with the gold fish init. it died after week 2.
sometimes i still swoop up that smell to my noise.
menace64
02-17-2008, 08:21 PM
when i was like 7-8 i would lay face down in the bath (with water ofc) and slide my cock up and down the base of the bath. I didn't masturbate at the time and it never led to a orgasm, it just felt good and i thought i was the only person in the world that could get that feeling :redface:
I did the same thing for what seems like years... and then one day - I kid you not - I turned over and thought, "Okay, now it's time to go Super Saiyan... take this to the next level!"
And then I jacked off for the first time. I was dumbfounded, and as I got closer to blasting my Kamehameha, I thought I was about to ascend to Super Saiyan Two.
How was I right. After I finished, I just stared at my cock and said, "Holy shit, what did I just do!?"
A week later, I'm still not sure what happened. Did I have sex?
Cheeseit
02-17-2008, 08:42 PM
i pissed in a supersoaker and hosed down my sister with it IN THE HOUSE
MadameX
02-17-2008, 09:57 PM
I used to dive behind this big pillow we had on our couch when I was about 6 years old and masturbate.
greg vs greg
02-17-2008, 10:41 PM
I did the same thing for what seems like years... and then one day - I kid you not - I turned over and thought, "Okay, now it's time to go Super Saiyan... take this to the next level!"
And then I jacked off for the first time. I was dumbfounded, and as I got closer to blasting my Kamehameha, I thought I was about to ascend to Super Saiyan Two.
How was I right. After I finished, I just stared at my cock and said, "Holy shit, what did I just do!?"
A week later, I'm still not sure what happened. Did I have sex?
Whenever our parents would have me clean our bathtub, I was too lazy to get a bucket of water, so I would just lick it clean.
Fuck you, brother. Fuck you.
This story is called "My First Girlfriend"
I used to be afraid of monsters under the bed when i was in elementary school. I always thought some hand would reach up and grab me. So I placed stuffed animals and toys all around the perimeter of the bed, and for some reason I thought this would be enough of a deterrent to stop a fucking monster. Well anyway, I would lie down in the middle of the bed with a wall of toys surrounding me, except for an old stuffed Minnie Mouse doll from when I was a baby. She would sleep right next to me sometimes, and I would kiss her and cuddle. It was adorable.
Father Max
02-17-2008, 10:45 PM
When I was in 1st grade I brought some kids back from the library and showed them how I would lay stomach down on the floor, then rub back and forth, making my dick feel good. I told them it was a type of push-up. It's weird because I never splooged or anything, but I still did it and it felt good.
willsk84food.
02-17-2008, 10:45 PM
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go.
your turn.
I am laughing so hard right now!:lmao::lmao::lmao:
Edit: I used to dry hump with my girlfriend when i was like 6. Naked. Fun.
that1guy
02-17-2008, 11:50 PM
LOL FAG
10 LOL FAGs
Queenbunnywitch
02-18-2008, 10:47 AM
Whenever our parents would have me clean our bathtub, I was too lazy to get a bucket of water, so I would just lick it clean.
Fuck you, brother. Fuck you.
This story is called "My First Girlfriend"
I used to be afraid of monsters under the bed when i was in elementary school. I always thought some hand would reach up and grab me. So I placed stuffed animals and toys all around the perimeter of the bed, and for some reason I thought this would be enough of a deterrent to stop a fucking monster. Well anyway, I would lie down in the middle of the bed with a wall of toys surrounding me, except for an old stuffed Minnie Mouse doll from when I was a baby. She would sleep right next to me sometimes, and I would kiss her and cuddle. It was adorable.
lol i had a stuffed animal army too, i had the top bunk of a bunk bed and i had the stuffed animals bordering my whole bed.
AquaXed
02-18-2008, 10:59 AM
When I was in the 1st grade, I was lying in bed one night when I was fantasizing about the sex scene from "Titanic" so I rubbed my crotch, as I obviously hadn't gotten the stroking the dick part figured out yet. The next day, I wet my bed.
glotwp55
02-18-2008, 11:14 AM
God this thread is pure gold. When I was like 8, I stuck my dick in a gigantic stuffed version of Flounder from the Little Mermaid that I won from a McDonalds. The one fin got ripped off so there was an open whole to the soft white stuff inside that I though would feel good. Boy was I wrong, the shit was like sand paper. :lmao:
razorwire61
02-18-2008, 04:16 PM
when i was 7 my next door neighbour used to babysit me and my sister and they had a daughter who was a year younger than me and we'd always go to the basement and play old Super nintendo. i dont know how it was started but we used to play naked and whenever we heard her mom comming we'd get dressed quickly. we did this for like a week untill we got curious and wanted to touch eachother each day. all this time my sister was in the room and she eventually told on us and ruined all the fun. my dad had a huge talk with me about how sex was wrong at my age and stuff and it fucked me up cus when i was older was always subconciosuly afraid to do stuff with ladies as much as i wanted to because i got in troube that one time... i know its not wrong now or nothing but its just starting to be fixed.
pretty shitty had to see a shrink
Daucus Karota
02-18-2008, 04:22 PM
I stuck one of my cousins barbie dolls up my own ass!
it hurt
rerat
02-18-2008, 04:23 PM
I stuck one of my cousins barbie dolls up my own ass!
it hurt
...and a Scandinavian flamer was borned.
jtwg
02-19-2008, 07:38 PM
When I was like 4 I would take a FACE cloth that was in our shower when I was taking a shower or bath and I would wrap it arouns my underwear area like a diaper and then when it was covering my ass and dick I could slap the part that was covering my balls. Oh and for about a month when I was like 8 I would wipe my ass and throw the tissue paper in the garbage instead of in the tolite and the bathroom smelled like shit 24/7
Dont judge me.
EDIT: Also sometimes when I just woke up and some one was in the shower, If i needed to take a piss, I would just piss all over my carpet and I would try to spread it out evenly.
/Δ\
02-19-2008, 07:45 PM
I used to steal my father's Rolling Stone magazines. I particularly favored thw one with Christina Aguilera lying down nude on the front cover holding a guitar. But I lost that one.
kingofallmedia
02-19-2008, 10:54 PM
Dont judge me.
i judged, sorry
shahab6
02-20-2008, 12:22 AM
When I was 11, and my cousin was 12, at my grandmother's house while we were in the same bed, I rubbed her vagina, breast and legs, and she was feeling on my penis.
bonenator
02-20-2008, 12:59 AM
me and my friends in california (was in kindergarte-1st grade) would wait till my friends older (15)yr old sister was changing and open the door really fast so we could see her naked. it was hot
Stomach Content
02-20-2008, 01:04 AM
When ever i was eating coco pops, i pictures the pops as people in boats and i used to laught at them cos im eating all these people in my bowl. I was like , your not getting away.
Trent215
02-20-2008, 01:07 AM
When I was 5 I would bang my hot ass milf neighbor...rich husband so she had the fake tittys and rode cock well
razorwire61
02-20-2008, 01:19 AM
^^^^^ me too
davido
02-20-2008, 02:23 PM
i put peanut butter in my balls once and let my gfs dog lick it off.
This is not a one time thing.:raiseeyeb
heartagram89
02-20-2008, 03:36 PM
When ever i was eating coco pops, i pictures the pops as people in boats and i used to laught at them cos im eating all these people in my bowl. I was like , your not getting away.
LMFAO!! :lmao:
Lemoritz
02-20-2008, 06:57 PM
I peed inside my own butt.
PantySnatcher is my favorite member hands down.
His Avatar is hilarious and his posts are hilarious. Quality shit.
Twiceasnice45
02-20-2008, 07:18 PM
i am starting to realize there are a lot of gay muthas on this board. A lot of homo shit going down in your lives.
Whatabum
02-20-2008, 07:28 PM
I was staying around my granddads house and my step-aunty(a year younger than me and not blood related at all) was sleeping in the same bed as me, i stuck my penis in her mouth while she was asleep then came on her face... i would do this again.
oh and just remembered another one.
Me and my cousin were playing monopoly around his house, for some reason both of our parents had gone out without telling us and the door was locked to the room so we were trapped in... i needed a piss really bad so i just went on the carpet, my cousin thought his was hilarious and he did it to... i only went there once.
PabloHoney
02-20-2008, 07:35 PM
i am starting to realize there are a lot of gay muthas on this board. A lot of homo shit going down in your lives.
People are gay, Get over it.
liquidz5
02-20-2008, 08:02 PM
masturbated over neighbour.OH LAWD SHE IS HAWT MILF!
doped_up_hobo
02-20-2008, 08:09 PM
i pissed in a supersoaker and hosed down my sister with it IN THE HOUSE
that just made me think back to when i was 13, i got up in the middle of the night and needed a piss, i don't know what the hell possesed me to do it, but i pissed all over my sleeping sisters head. when i was done i took a moment to think about what i did and i literally started to ROTFL. then she woke up and the look on her face made me nearly fucking die of laughter. oh maaaan. my dad beat the crap out of me. was worth it, the memory of such laughter just makes me laugh again.
also the nieghborhood i lived in when i was 3-6, was filled with little kids who were sex fiends. i got raped by an 11 year old girl! when i think about it it's fucking bizzare. there was even a little prozzie, seriously, everyone had dry humped her.
Mattjam
02-20-2008, 08:25 PM
i am starting to realize there are a lot of gay muthas on this board. A lot of homo shit going down in your lives.
Your sig. A word is spelled wrong. I'll leave it to you to find which one.
ST4NK
02-20-2008, 11:45 PM
This thread is epic.
that1guy
02-20-2008, 11:54 PM
i licked hot sauce off some random guys nipples
jenkem
02-20-2008, 11:56 PM
I used to visit this teen puberty forum and masturbate to what the girl's had done. Sometimes, they would put anecdotes about their first shower head, Zucchini, Cucumber, or banana.
Those were the days. *sigh*
Nimnom
02-21-2008, 12:17 AM
Good video on the subject:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=MbOQXV_AZgY
Frood
02-21-2008, 12:27 AM
When I was six(ish) and my parents made me go to Church I would get bored so one time I decided to play a new game with myself. I would stick my penis out the waistband and see how long I could keep the tip out before I thought somebody was looking. Not that perverted, but kind of weird.
Nefarious
02-22-2008, 12:31 AM
When I was 10 or 11 my baby sitter and I watched the spice channel and she asked if i wanted to do to her what was on tv and that was eat her out. I was like ok, so i ate her pussy and fucked her. It was really akward because i didnt know what i was doing and it was my first time.
I remember when i was a kid like 5 or 6 my baby sitter who was like 15 or 16 would breast feed me. I guess she got her jollies off by having a 6 yearold suck her tits.
I remember last year when i had to get a physical for a job i was waiting in the reception room for the doctor to give me a full psysical and this hot chick walked in and for some reason i just got this massive boner then the doctor called my name a few seconds later and brought me into the examination room and told me to undress and put on this gown, she left but i still had this massive boner and only thinking about it made it worse then the doctor comes in and gives me a hernia exame she was like "dont worry thats a perfectly normal response" i was glad it was a female doctor.
I remember when I was like 20 and I worked at this sex shop called lovers lane and this mid 50 ish lady came in and she was a sex freak and was talking to me about all this crazy sex shit and how she has sex parties and swings all the time. The lady goes into the dressing room to try on some langere then sticks her head out and calls for me to go into the room. The other employee chick i was fucking at the time goes into the room and the lady asked if my fuck toy friend would suck on her titties and finger her asshole but she didnt. Me and my fuck toy friend wanted to get drunk that day at work but we werent 21 yet so we I asked the freaky lady if she would buy us alcohol and she said ok so i went with her and she got us the booze for free but she asked me if i would stick the ass beads she just bought in her ass and suck her titts while she gave me a hand job for 50 bucks and i was like OK. Then I went back to the store and my fucktoy friend was like "did you fuck that lady" i was like "hell no".
Oh and one time at a house party i hooked up with this one chick and fucked her nasty stlye with no jimmy hat and when i was about to cum i pulled out and busted this massive load that shot far as hell, I got part of her face, the back board of the bed and alot of it went on the wall and the night stand. Its funny how far you can shoot a load when its good pussy.
I stold this kids car one time when he was passed out drunk at my crib and i was with this one chick just driving around getting drunk and i was like "give me some head" so she sucked my dick off and then i busted a nutt all over this dudes control pannel and cd player.
I dont know if any of that shit is perverted but its fucked up.
good times!
Secsy_Banana
02-22-2008, 02:45 PM
One time, when I was like 13, I was bored and decided to masturbate. But this time I found a world records book and it had a picture of Jennifer Aniston in it, so I cummed on her picture, in a book..It was pretty fucked up.
DaDigits
02-22-2008, 04:54 PM
I used to visit this teen puberty forum and masturbate to what the girl's had done. Sometimes, they would put anecdotes about their first shower head, Zucchini, Cucumber, or banana.
Those were the days. *sigh*
LINK! NOW!
Ham Rove
02-22-2008, 04:56 PM
LINK! NOW!
:lol: I was thinking the same thing. sounds like a neat place
CoyoteUgly71
02-22-2008, 05:34 PM
you expect us to believe you tried to deepthroat a dildo?
strikeandburn
02-22-2008, 05:49 PM
I used to visit this teen puberty forum and masturbate to what the girl's had done. Sometimes, they would put anecdotes about their first shower head, Zucchini, Cucumber, or banana.
Those were the days. *sigh*
Your not alone! :raiseeyeb
teh_hyena
02-22-2008, 09:10 PM
my sister was having a sleepover with her friends, while they were sleeping i began to beat off and blasted a gooey stream right in one of her friends mouth
bonenator
02-22-2008, 09:14 PM
bullshit not buyin it
Osiris5217
02-23-2008, 01:17 AM
Back in 1st grade I had these shorts that were really too short (a whore would wear shorts these short) and there was a small hole at the crotch. Anyways, during class when I would get bored I would pull some of my ballsack through the hole.
To make a long story short, it stopped after my teacher caught me doing it.
Nefarious
02-23-2008, 02:15 AM
The ony perverted thing i have ever done was try to suck my own dick....I made it to my tip and could of sucked the whole fuck up but it wasnt all that apealing. I just waned to see if i could do it. I could realistically give my self a half a blow job if i wanted to.
bonenator
02-23-2008, 02:28 AM
Back in 1st grade I had these shorts that were really too short (a whore would wear shorts these short) and there was a small hole at the crotch. Anyways, during class when I would get bored I would pull some of my ballsack through the hole.
To make a long story short, it stopped after my teacher caught me doing it.
:lmao::lmao:lmao
Burnt Socks
02-23-2008, 03:49 AM
I was 14 at the time when I stuck a GI-Joe action figure up my ass, then I gave it to one of the neighborhood kids to play with. He was pretty happy when he I gave it to him, I let it sit for 2 weeks so it wouldn't stink. Jokes on him lol.
bonenator
02-23-2008, 07:14 AM
dude whaaaat
Baldman
03-11-2008, 10:13 AM
This thread is beyond epic. First page.
10firstpages
Ari Gold
03-11-2008, 10:48 AM
To this day I still jerk off with sand paper gloves to my own baby picture.
xDojo
04-04-2008, 12:37 AM
bump, this is good
teh_hyena
04-04-2008, 12:42 AM
i would draw smiley faces on my cock like ---> and put my cousins barbie dresses on my shaft and give it a personality.
SwyfT
04-04-2008, 01:01 AM
i would draw smiley faces on my cock like ---> and put my cousins barbie dresses on my shaft and give it a personality.
Quoted for Quality (QfQ)
When I was 10 this 7 year old girl I was babysat with would find any way she could to sit on me... naked.
Travman93
04-04-2008, 01:02 AM
When I was 4 and my cousin was 6, she was like "I saw this on TV. Take off your underwear." So I did, but I did it in the clauset. Then she said lay down and I did and she like laid over me and my grandpa came in and goes "WTF GET OUT OF HERE TRAVIS!!!"
TopRightCorner
04-04-2008, 01:03 AM
Me and my sister's doll had a thing for a while.
rambino
04-04-2008, 09:10 AM
These are child porn stories.. u Pedos!
duel
04-04-2008, 10:29 AM
When you're really little, you can get away with going in the other sexes changing rooms, toilets and showers at sport centres and other places.
I used to watch the women and get a boner, rub my cock and bend it a bit.
I also used to fuck sleeping bags
I.H.E.
04-04-2008, 11:31 AM
During the summer when I was 15 or 16 my mom and dad used to work all day and I just stayed home by myself. There was a girl who was about 8 or 9 who lived next door, and sometimes if her mom had to go out for a little while she'd just have me keep an eye on her. One day I was watching her and we were swimming in the pool in my backyard, but she couldn't swim very well, so she kept hanging on to me. She'd throw her arms around me and thrash around, and then her leg rubbed on my dick. She asked what it was, and I told her it was my privates. She said she never seen a penis before, and wanted to see mine.
I knew what I was about to do was wrong, but damn... this little 8 year old girl was hot. So I said ok, let's go inside and dry off, then I'll show you. So we went inside and dried off, and I told her ok, you can see it now. I pulled my shorts down, and showed her my raging hard on. I asked if she wanted to touch it, and she said yes. I showed her how to stroke it so it felt good, and she did. I asked her if she wanted to taste it, and she said yes. So she put it in her mouth and started giving me an awesome blowjob. I pulled out and started cumming all over this cute little 8 year olds face, when all of a sudden my mom walked in on us. Boy, was she upset. I molested one little girl and my mom got scared and said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in bel air.
The_Guitarist
04-04-2008, 02:14 PM
During the summer when I was 15 or 16 my mom and dad used to work all day and I just stayed home by myself. There was a girl who was about 8 or 9 who lived next door, and sometimes if her mom had to go out for a little while she'd just have me keep an eye on her. One day I was watching her and we were swimming in the pool in my backyard, but she couldn't swim very well, so she kept hanging on to me. She'd throw her arms around me and thrash around, and then her leg rubbed on my dick. She asked what it was, and I told her it was my privates. She said she never seen a penis before, and wanted to see mine.
I knew what I was about to do was wrong, but damn... this little 8 year old girl was hot. So I said ok, let's go inside and dry off, then I'll show you. So we went inside and dried off, and I told her ok, you can see it now. I pulled my shorts down, and showed her my raging hard on. I asked if she wanted to touch it, and she said yes. I showed her how to stroke it so it felt good, and she did. I asked her if she wanted to taste it, and she said yes. So she put it in her mouth and started giving me an awesome blowjob. I pulled out and started cumming all over this cute little 8 year olds face, when all of a sudden my mom walked in on us. Boy, was she upset. I molested one little girl and my mom got scared and said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in bel air.
*fap fap felp*
FlyinG ShoosteR
04-04-2008, 02:17 PM
This thread delivers.
Queenbunnywitch
04-04-2008, 04:15 PM
Ya know. I think i might have been molested when I was younger. I dont mean by my stepdad i know that happened. But i vaguely remember when my mom left me in the care of this lady that also took care of 3 or 4 other kids. I think I was the youngest. Anyway, there was this kid, I dont remember if it was a boy or girl but it took me like under the bed. I had to have been in pampers cuz i remember the kid pulling down my pamper and rubbing its genitals on mine. Then I remember it being time to eat and some other kid came to call us to eat but couldnt find us. I remember thinking it was a game and wanting to laugh. I dunno if that was a dream I had but if i dreamed that as a kid thats pretty fucked up.
Jeromiah
04-04-2008, 06:08 PM
Ya know. I think i might have been molested when I was younger. I dont mean by my stepdad i know that happened. But i vaguely remember when my mom left me in the care of this lady that also took care of 3 or 4 other kids. I think I was the youngest. Anyway, there was this kid, I dont remember if it was a boy or girl but it took me like under the bed. I had to have been in pampers cuz i remember the kid pulling down my pamper and rubbing its genitals on mine. Then I remember it being time to eat and some other kid came to call us to eat but couldnt find us. I remember thinking it was a game and wanting to laugh. I dunno if that was a dream I had but if i dreamed that as a kid thats pretty fucked up.
THAT WAS YOU!? OMG, finaly we meet againg.
Osama Bin Laden
04-04-2008, 07:41 PM
Dammit, so you were under the bed when i couldnt find you when it was time to eat. assholes
Fag Boy
04-05-2008, 03:08 AM
In chronological order starting at about 5, not sure if all of these are perverted, but they are weird none the less so I will put them in.
You know those big 4ft barbies they used to have, life sized barbie or something like that. Well my sister had and me and the Barbie got naked and I laid on top of it and made out with it, not sure why.
I had this uncanny habit of taking a dump in my toy box, my dad always found it soon after, but I would just deny it, thinking he might think it was my mom or something.
Around that age me and a friend where watching terminator, i think, and we kept rewinding the sex scene, and my mom walked in and yelled at us, and I just told here we were trying to learn.
A friend stayed over and fell asleep before me, so I rubbed a keychain on his cock, and in the morning told him to put it in his mouth, without giving a reason. He did it, and then I told him what I had done, and we laughed, mainly because we didn’t realize how fucking gay that was.
My neighbor’s house was maybe 6 feet away from mine, and they would leave the window midway up their stairway open, and I would piss out the second floor window of my room, into their window, on probably a weekly basis, until one night I was doing it, and the lights turned on in their living room.
This one is pretty normal. I would straddle the side of a couch and hump and rub my dick all over it. The wierd part is I would do this when other people were in the room, mainly my brothers, until one day I did it when my mom was in the room and she yelled at me.
One summer afternoon we were eating dinner and I was eating some corn on the cob. After I finished all the kernels, I started sucking at the cob. It wasn’t a normal suck, like you would do to your fingers after a good bag of chips. I was working that cob like the dirtiest whores work a cock. Everyone laughed at me, but I just kept on sucking. On a scale of 1-10 of awesome blowjobs, the work being done on that cob was at least a 9. I long for the day when I can get a blowjob the way I sucked on the corn cob.
now im around the age of 10
me and a friend had a sleepover, and for some reason we wanted to role play where one of us would pretend to be and abusive husband and the other the wife. I started the game by coming and telling her(him) to get on the bed, where I proceeded to "dry" rape her(him) doggystyle. Then it was his turn, and we just kept on alternating, trying different positions for about an hour. I could feel his wiener poking me in my butt.
Around 5th grade I had this girl in my class that was my "girlfriend" and this was off and on. One week we would be holding hands at lunch, and the next week I would put dog shit in a plastic baggy and put it inside here desk at school.
During 5th grade I discovered masturbation, and at night on the top of my bunk bed with my brother below me, I would pull my dick out and put it through the hole in my underwear(but not the pee hole, the hole I had ripped open from skidmarks) and jerk of with it. I referred to this nightly event as "The Mass Masturbation". I slept with the door open as did my sister, and one night I realized that there was a perfect line of sight from my sisters bed to my bed across the hall, and thats when I stopped doing that.
I was somewhat of a class clown in school and would often get sent in the hallway almost daily, and the majority of the time this happened I would rub one out while sitting in the chair. This was dangerous, because someone could just turn the corner, and I wouldnt hear it coming. Once after I had done this and was back in class, some girl was like "you having something on the side of your pants" and tried to rub it off, and i joked and said "Oh, thats just cum", and she laughed.
Had another dry humping incident at a different friends house, but this one involved a third person, and lasted much longer, and ill just leave that one at that.
I used to make fake anonymous email accounts when I was like 13 and send pictures of my cock to girls at school asking them they thought it was big.
thats enough for now.
D3mko
04-05-2008, 04:11 AM
Some of you have some issues...
Shit...
Go see a shrink?
sprayin
04-06-2008, 12:49 AM
when i was yunger i pissed on a pokemon card and put it in my floppy disk drive cause i thought it would turn into a hollow one the more valuable ones
teh_hyena
04-06-2008, 01:00 AM
when i was yunger i pissed on a pokemon card and put it in my floppy disk drive cause i thought it would turn into a hollow one the more valuable ones
i laffed.hard
FuNkYFreSH
04-06-2008, 01:00 AM
when I was 10 I use to watch my best friend's sister (16) change clothes. He use to check out his own sister too
sprayin
04-06-2008, 01:07 AM
i laffed.hard
it didnt work so dont try it dude
proton
04-06-2008, 01:13 AM
When I was maybe 5 or so, my mother took me over to a nieghbours house for coffee and chit chat. This woman was doing dishes in her nightgown. So, feeling a bit randy, I got on the floor with my View Master (Link to pic if your not familiar (http://www.edcenter.sdsu.edu/cs575viz/viewmaster.gif)) and slowly made my way across the floor on my back untill I was close enough to look up her nightgown. To my suprise, she wasn't wearing any panties. So here I am clicking away at my viewmaster (Mickey Mouse if I remember correctly) and getting my first real look at ass and pussy. Good times.
whistlingpoop
04-06-2008, 02:48 AM
I use to have my guy cousin over every weekend to go swimming. After he used my bathroom for the first time I noticed that there were skid marks on my thongs. So I thought I would show him a lesson and put this old gay mans pink dildo that had mushrooms growing out of his ass from some weird disease. So I put it in my drawer I think there were a few of his ass pubes left over on it though and me an my mom watched him deepthroat it. I also just took my thongs and put them in my closet. Then put this other chick I know who had vagina cottage cheese disease and put them in my drawer. Then I found cum stains on the carpet so I started locking my door.
iMAC90
04-06-2008, 03:14 AM
Well when i was 5 years old i heated up the cars cigarette lighter and i pushed it against my thumb..i didnt react for a few seconds until i noticed my skin peel off
wasnt perverted but was it worth reading?
lorddread
04-06-2008, 03:18 AM
I had sex with yo momma
iMAC90
04-06-2008, 09:45 PM
download moar ram.
RorShap
04-06-2008, 09:49 PM
I would run around the house with my weener out.
Sometimes me and my friend would slap weeners and have weeners fights. Back then it was cool but now that i think about it its pretty nasty.
It's 3AM and I think I just woke my entire family up with laughter. Fuck you, you evil weiner warrior you.
As for me, I would sometimes sleep naked with my toys cars. Automobiliality.
Yeti Patrol
04-06-2008, 10:37 PM
I used to drag my ass across the living room floor.
jenkem
04-06-2008, 10:45 PM
I used to drag my ass across the living room floor.
My dog drags his balls across the floor.
Father Max
04-06-2008, 10:47 PM
I used to rub my dick through my pants during school when I was in second grade, but it ending when the girl next to me asked if I needed to go pee.
The_Guitarist
04-06-2008, 10:48 PM
My dog drags his balls across the floor.
My dog drags his balls across my ass.
jenkem
04-06-2008, 10:49 PM
My dog drags his balls across my ass.
In Soviet Russia, floors drag you across.
The_Guitarist
04-06-2008, 10:50 PM
In Soviet Russia, floors drag you across.
In communist China you don't get a floor.
jenkem
04-06-2008, 11:10 PM
In communist China you don't get a floor.
You do if you bribe the government. Corruption at it's finest.
TheMuffinMan
04-07-2008, 12:47 AM
My neighbor’s house was maybe 6 feet away from mine, and they would leave the window midway up their stairway open, and I would piss out the second floor window of my room, into their window, on probably a weekly basis, until one night I was doing it, and the lights turned on in their living room.
aahaahahahahahahah
RoastBRAIN
04-07-2008, 01:11 AM
I used to rub my dick through my pants during school when I was in second grade, but it ending when the girl next to me asked if I needed to go pee.You musta have had fleas or something and thats why you scratched.
You wernt masterbating or doing anything sexual for your concern cos you were not even at that level to know anything about what sexual is.
I didnt know what porn was until i was in year 7. Someone told me.
Crazy Gnome
04-07-2008, 06:34 PM
Me and my best friend had set up this tent in his basement when I was like seven. His sister who was a year younger than me had a huge crush on me. I had seen her naked before because we bathed together a few times in our younger days. But for some reason in this basement tent she let everything fly. She pretty much forced me to finger her. I also made out with her and hit second base a few times. One day she pulled my pants down and grabbed my dick and thats when I put a stop to the "naked club" as we called it. Looking back on it now it was very strange when my friend(her brother) used to dry hump her when she was naked showing us what he had seen on cinimax.
Also once at the age of eleven I jerked off for about 20 minuets once in a pool underneath my bathing suit. It was the middle of suburbia and probably all the neighbors were watching me do it but I never came.
Murray_Lips
04-07-2008, 08:04 PM
Murray_Lips
04-07-2008, 08:04 PM
When I was like 11 me and 2 of my male buddies had a long dry-humping session in my living room. It seemed like a good idea at the time, beats playstation any day.
I'm pretty sure at one point we were pulling a train.
Father Max
04-07-2008, 08:08 PM
You musta have had fleas or something and thats why you scratched.
You wernt masterbating or doing anything sexual for your concern cos you were not even at that level to know anything about what sexual is.
I didnt know what porn was until i was in year 7. Someone told me.
Actually rubbing my dick felt good back then. I never came or anything, but it always felt good.
lovestospooge
04-09-2008, 07:09 PM
i used to crawl under the table in primary school and look at the girls underwear because they all wore skirts with their legs wide open
in primary school we all got changed for p.e in the same room so i watched the girls
primary school was a good time...
kingofallmedia
04-09-2008, 07:37 PM
^^^^ lol that would be a lawsuit if it was allowed today
Murray_Lips
04-09-2008, 07:39 PM
^^^^ lol that would be a lawsuit if it was allowed today
Only if you get caught, amateurs.
PokemonMaster
04-09-2008, 07:44 PM
This thread cause many many boners.
aooga12
04-09-2008, 08:04 PM
I once walked in on my 78 year old grandma undressing... she had just her underwear on
Just thought I would throw that in!
same here man.... GOD i was disgusted...
i pissed in a supersoaker and hosed down my sister with it IN THE HOUSE
i did that too!! my next door dickhead though tea in a supersoaker is funny, so i pissed in mine and mixed with lemonaid, and got him right in the mouth... i then went to fighiting him 20 minutes later with a 1 hit ko...
DaDigits
04-10-2008, 12:24 AM
When I was in 4th grade I used to pretend to accedently drop my pencil under the table (there would be like six kids to a table) and look up the girls skirts....if they wore a skirt most of the time I was foiled by jeans! DAMN YOU LEVI STRUSSE! Any who I always thought I was super secretive about it but I stopped doing it when a girl sitting across from me asked me why I kept dropping my pencil. I lied as said cause I was avoiding the work.
Also when I four I would take shits in the dog run on the side of the house because I would see the dogs do it and thought it was OK.
teh_hyena
04-10-2008, 12:28 AM
When I was in 4th grade I used to pretend to accedently drop my pencil under the table (there would be like six kids to a table) and look up the girls skirts....if they wore a skirt most of the time I was foiled by jeans! DAMN YOU LEVI STRUSSE! Any who I always thought I was super secretive about it but I stopped doing it when a girl sitting across from me asked me why I kept dropping my pencil. I lied as said cause I was avoiding the work.
i got a hilarious mental image from this.
Anarchology
04-10-2008, 01:39 AM
Me and my best friend had set up this tent in his basement when I was like seven. His sister who was a year younger than me had a huge crush on me. I had seen her naked before because we bathed together a few times in our younger days. But for some reason in this basement tent she let everything fly. She pretty much forced me to finger her. I also made out with her and hit second base a few times. One day she pulled my pants down and grabbed my dick and thats when I put a stop to the "naked club" as we called it. Looking back on it now it was very strange when my friend(her brother) used to dry hump her when she was naked showing us what he had seen on cinimax.
Hahaha, thats fucking awesome. The brother rubbing up on the sis was a little weird. Looks like Skinamax is for all ages!
Achillies
04-10-2008, 01:49 AM
I used to fuck a bottle of water, thinking that's what it's like inside a twat. All that did really was make it taste funny.
FlavaDave
04-10-2008, 03:04 AM
when i was like 5 i had 'private time' with my next door neighbour
im pretty sure we both put our dicks in each others mouths
we refuse to talk about it
i think it scarred me for life...
Lord Vollum
04-10-2008, 09:41 PM
I am really starting to think you're a troll.
jtwg
04-10-2008, 09:51 PM
When I was like 8 me and my friend were having a sleep over and we were sleeping in the same bed and I had a raging boner and I pulled it out and showed him, I pulled my balls over it and then was like, its not gay you can only see skin you can't see the purple part.
FlavaDave
04-11-2008, 04:23 AM
I am really starting to think you're a troll.
wtf is a troll
DoubleAey
04-11-2008, 04:32 PM
i remember, everytime someone would fart, my lil brother would run up behind them and stick his face in their ass and sniff their farts up... he said he enjoyed the smells. it lasted a year until one day my dad shat himself while my brother was sniffing and he felt it on his face.
HAHAHAHAHHAAH
i laugh at him.
whistlingpoop
04-12-2008, 04:31 AM
I use to bring popsicle sticks with me everytime I went poop. Because I would stick the poop on the popsicle stick and lick it. Then one day I decided to bring some with me to school. When I got in the bathroom I couldn't poop so I just found one lying around the floor and put it on the stick. When I came back into the classroom I gave all 4 of the poop on stickd to kids to eat and just told them it was a new lolipop. Then the teacher just stared at us from her desk while we were eating an licking it.
Dayve
04-12-2008, 04:50 AM
When i was 6 me and my mom used to live right across the road from one of her old school friends who had 2 daughters. She'd go over there every day to talk about useless shit that women talk about for 4 hours and i'd go upstairs and play with her daughters.
Long story short, i was 6 years old, they were 6 and 7, i couldn't even get a hardon and all 3 of us used to hide under the blankets of their beds and take turns kissing.
I GOT MORE PUSSY WHEN I WAS 6 THAN I DO NOW AT 19!
We still live close, maybe i'll knock on their house one day and see if they want to play like we used to play when we were 6.
Oh and i also used to drop pencils under the tables at school so i could look up girls skirts... I was 5-6 at the time.
DaDigits
04-12-2008, 05:12 AM
I used to fuck a bottle of water, thinking that's what it's like inside a twat. All that did really was make it taste funny.
You got one small prick if it can fit into a water bottle.
Boss_King
04-12-2008, 07:05 AM
I used to fuck a bottle of water, thinking that's what it's like inside a twat. All that did really was make it taste funny.
i used to do the same thing, i used them as primitive penis pumps...i tried to make my dick bigger:dunce:
Achillies
04-12-2008, 09:26 PM
You got one small prick if it can fit into a water bottle.
Yeah, but what a confidence builder. In the bottle it looked really big and bulky.
thejoelmister
04-13-2008, 10:02 PM
your dick can fit into a bottle of water?
ftbllplr
04-13-2008, 10:19 PM
Sometimes I'd do that, except with a mason jar.
Achillies
04-14-2008, 03:00 AM
Yeah, it fitted fine. No complaints.
dazevas
04-14-2008, 03:01 AM
i once tried to fit it in a gatorade bottle but failed.
Rico_Suave
06-07-2008, 09:16 PM
I used to make fake anonymous email accounts when I was like 13 and send pictures of my cock to girls at school asking them they thought it was big.
thats enough for now.
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
melodeathpwns
01-08-2008, 06:03 PM
I clapped my asscheeks in a babies face once. Let's see any of you beat that.
Rapex
01-08-2008, 06:08 PM
post some nasty shit you used to do (or still do) ...
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
You shoved your cousins thongs up your ass? :lmao:
Stoink
01-08-2008, 06:24 PM
I once walked in on my 78 year old grandma undressing... she had just her underwear on
Just thought I would throw that in!
Bicepto
01-08-2008, 06:45 PM
My uncle said not to tell about it...
Papero
01-08-2008, 06:48 PM
I used to make out with a Snow White action figure under my dining room table and did the deed especially when someone was nearby because I thought no one could see me, felt naughty. I got from McDonalds when I was like 5.
TICKLETIME
01-08-2008, 06:59 PM
I drove this girl home from a party and she invited me inside, so im thinking im gonna have a good night. well were making out and she says those words that tell you your 100% in "let me go freshen up" so she goes into the bathroom. After 5 minutes the door opens (the one to the house, it was her mom (shes 18, so you guys dont think im a pedo) and she sends me a text saying "sorry my moms home
we'll finish this another night, sneak out when my moms not looking" And i was pretty pissed and still had a boner, so i jacked off into her bed and snuck out. she never did end up finishing what she promised.
Oh, this was only a month ago.
emericanlegend
01-08-2008, 07:01 PM
yea once in the sand
Queenbunnywitch
01-08-2008, 09:51 PM
I used to make my barbies have sex. All the time.
Iaretehpwn
01-08-2008, 09:52 PM
I used to lick the bewbies on the barbies. And take a shower with them.
J-nad
01-08-2008, 10:00 PM
My aunt used to have this hot, 20-something year old maid at her house and she always walked around barefoot or in these pink flipflops and they were always dirty due to her using them all the time so I fell in love with her feet.
One day she left with my aunt to do dome errands and I went into her room and licked her flipflops clean. My cock was bursting!
I jacked off while sniffing inside one of her shoes and cummed on the floor. I was 14.
Warka
01-08-2008, 10:07 PM
I would run around the house with my weener out.
Sometimes me and my friend would slap weeners and have weeners fights. Back then it was cool but now that i think about it its pretty nasty.
WayneHead
01-08-2008, 10:08 PM
I tried to quickly beat off while in presence of other hot girls. For example: When i was in the jacuzzi with my friends, Jackie was the hottest of my friend girls, and she looked fuking hot in that bikini she was in. Well she let out a sigh of relaxation that made me have a boner so big i couldn't get rid of it. I had to crouch down lower in that thing. So i tried to beat off, but i couldn't succeed orgasm. I had to sneak out of that jacuzzi with my penis up against my stomache, and i hid the head of the penis with my hand.
Jackie was a friend that i wanted to fuck, but i was too afraid to ask, and plus i was young, and still a virgin that time. I still have contact with her but i didn't hang out with her since last month.
Joeybits
01-08-2008, 10:09 PM
One day i flashed my sisters best friend
She was shocked and appalled, but couldn't look away
WonderFunk
01-08-2008, 10:11 PM
some jackass once clapped his ass in my face when i was about 6 months old.. my parents told me this about a week ago =[
Krippled By Kush
01-08-2008, 10:25 PM
i used to shit on the floor and blame it on the cat, the only thang was that the turd was waaaay too big for a cats ass, my grandma found out quickly.
puppetmasterjjk
01-08-2008, 10:54 PM
Me and my friend used to go pee together.
Queenbunnywitch
01-08-2008, 10:55 PM
lol my cousin has a picture of her taking a shit on the toilet at the same time as my cousin her age, theyre like 2 and have the biggest grins on their faces.
that1guy
01-08-2008, 11:02 PM
i used to go through my sisters underwear drawer...i also used to hide under her bed and watch her get dressed in like second grade.
I played nasty truth or dare with a friend when we were in like third grade.
PantySnatcher
01-08-2008, 11:04 PM
I peed inside my own butt.
SwyfT
01-08-2008, 11:11 PM
I peed inside my own butt.
Why do I want to see that?
Murray_Lips
01-08-2008, 11:15 PM
When I was 12 or so, my buddy jacked off to the gallery on Dead Or Alive 2 on PS2 whilst I cheered him on. We pretty much wanted to see how many times he could ejaculate in the space of an hour.
gatorpatric0
01-08-2008, 11:16 PM
I used to scratch my asshole ALOT.
altect
01-08-2008, 11:18 PM
I used to scratch my asshole ALOT.
thats not perverted. Do you sniff it after?
gatorpatric0
01-08-2008, 11:20 PM
thats not perverted. Do you sniff it after?
Not usually. This was in the past btw...now I know if my asshole itches, I need to go wipe my ass better.
PantySnatcher
01-08-2008, 11:21 PM
Not usually. This was in the past btw...now I know if my asshole itches, I need to go wipe my ass better.
Actually, itchy sphincter occurs when urine runs down through the various crevices and makes contact with the fecal aperture, usually during diarrhea.
I know this because I used to pee inside my own butt.
altect
01-08-2008, 11:23 PM
Not usually. This was in the past btw...now I know if my asshole itches, I need to go wipe my ass better.
oh thats way it smells...:idea:
thebassman
01-09-2008, 01:08 AM
Do you sniff it after?
you dont?
i wallow in my own feces.
Tunes
01-09-2008, 01:13 AM
When i was 4ish me and the other kids at the baby sitters would dry hump..
Thought it was fine at the time, now it seems perverted
J-nad
01-09-2008, 01:22 AM
When I was little I used to put my hand in my ass and smell it. There was something good about the smell.
DaDigits
01-09-2008, 01:25 AM
I honestly can't think of anything I did when I was younger. Maybe that's why I am so perverted now.
altect
01-09-2008, 01:40 AM
When I was little I used to put my hand in my ass and smell it. There was something good about the smell.
i still like that smell, funny thing is i dont like the the smell of other peoples asses
DaDigits
01-09-2008, 01:41 AM
i still like that smell, funny thing is i dont like the the smell of other peoples asses
Its the same as farts for everyone. Your own ass is a stinky smell but its your stink so its not bad.
cust4rd
01-09-2008, 03:47 PM
I clapped my asscheeks in a babies face once. Let's see any of you beat that.
some jackass once clapped his ass in my face when i was about 6 months old.. my parents told me this about a week ago =[
HAAAHAHAHAHHA11
SnAiLz
01-09-2008, 04:04 PM
when i was like 7-8 i would lay face down in the bath (with water ofc) and slide my cock up and down the base of the bath. I didn't masturbate at the time and it never led to a orgasm, it just felt good and i thought i was the only person in the world that could get that feeling :redface:
MashTorrance
01-09-2008, 04:50 PM
When I was like 6 years old, my mom used to babysit this girl in my neighborhood named Ashley. She was about a year younger than I was. One day, we decided to play "doctor" in my room. I was the doctor and she was the patient. I checked her heart beat with a toy stethoscope, then pretended to give her a shot with a toy needle, when all of a sudden she was like "you forgot to check here." She then innocently pulled down her pants/panties like it was nothing. This was my first memory of seeing a live vagina. Being 6 years old, I was like wtf?!?!?! I put the stethoscope up against it for a brief moment, then pulled her pants up. The next day at school I told all my friends that girls had two butts lol.
That and I used to hump basketballs.
melodeathpwns
01-09-2008, 04:58 PM
When I was like 6 years old, my mom used to babysit this girl in my neighborhood named Ashley. She was about a year younger than I was. One day, we decided to play "doctor" in my room. I was the doctor and she was the patient. I checked her heart beat with a toy stethoscope, then pretended to give her a shot with a toy needle, when all of a sudden she was like "you forgot to check here." She then innocently pulled down her pants/panties like it was nothing. This was my first memory of seeing a live vagina. Being 6 years old, I was like wtf?!?!?! I put the stethoscope up against it for a brief moment, then pulled her pants up. The next day at school I told all my friends that girls had two butts lol.
That and I used to hump basketballs.
Oh, thats so fucking hawt. *fap fap fap fap fap fap*
Bidwell
01-09-2008, 07:30 PM
When I was like 6 years old, my mom used to babysit this girl in my neighborhood named Ashley. She was about a year younger than I was. One day, we decided to play "doctor" in my room. I was the doctor and she was the patient. I checked her heart beat with a toy stethoscope, then pretended to give her a shot with a toy needle, when all of a sudden she was like "you forgot to check here." She then innocently pulled down her pants/panties like it was nothing. This was my first memory of seeing a live vagina. Being 6 years old, I was like wtf?!?!?! I put the stethoscope up against it for a brief moment, then pulled her pants up. The next day at school I told all my friends that girls had two butts lol.
That and I used to hump basketballs.
Best final sentence in any post ever. You could rival M. Night Shyamalan in terms of plot twists.
I used to hang on the monkey bars, cross my legs, and flap them back and forth. The subsequent friction was like a really ineffective form of masturbation. Some girl saw me doing it at school once in the second grade, and asked me what I was doing. I didn't want to admit it, so I just told her I was flying using my legs. I covered that shit up smooth.
alexcopane
01-09-2008, 07:58 PM
We had this costa rican nanny when I was probably about 4 years old. I remember sitting on the couch next to her and she started licking my ear like really hardcore. It felt really good, so when she stopped I was like no, don't stop that feels good, and she started up again.
Yuseke
01-09-2008, 08:08 PM
OOH! I got one!
i tried to suck my own dick when i was 10 years old...now my backs all fucked up.. now i have these fucked up stretch marks all over my back. is there any medical procedure to get rid of them???
Faggot
IWinAtLife
01-09-2008, 10:55 PM
When i was about 12, i went to the zoo with my cousin and instead of taking pictures of aniamls, i was taking pictures of upskirts. I was so fucking horny, i spent all my money that my mum gave me on more phtot film just so i can take more upskirt photos. When the photos got developed i was so happy that i had such awesome jack off material. But the photos ended up being shit, they were blurry and too far away. My brother ended up seeing the photos and was like wtf?
Oh yeah, and once when i was 14 i wa so horny one night that i fucked my little brothers toy dinosaur. It was a big fluffy toy and i fucked the shit out of it in a frenzy.
sava
01-10-2008, 07:22 AM
i used to shit on the floor and blame it on the cat, the only thang was that the turd was waaaay too big for a cats ass, my grandma found out quickly.
one of the funniest threads I've read in a long time...:lol:
mince
01-10-2008, 07:30 AM
When we were both 8 years old, me and my cousin used to touch each others penises and balls because we thought it was funny. We also used to take turns making his Dr. Blight action figure do pole dances on our erections. We've never spoken about it as adults.
Dionne
01-10-2008, 08:40 AM
When we were 10, me and my best friend used to grab each others boobs "by accident". It just used to make us laugh, plus she started puberty REALLY early and i think i was facinated by them.
We also used to leave a tape recorder in the bathroom before my grandad used the toilet because he would always fart. Then me and my friend would listen to it in histerics.
I used to draw pictures of people having sex. I was only young and didnt know the full sexual proceedure. I thought that when the penis went inside the vagina, the penis extends (kind of like a collapsable hand-held telescope) and tickles the woman from inside. My mum found my drawings and wondered if i had been drinking her cider. I was 11 years old!
cust4rd
01-15-2008, 02:33 PM
shoved my fingers up in my ass and smelled it
not.
Lologirl
01-15-2008, 02:42 PM
played the "you show me yours, i show you mine" game with the neighborhood boys when we would go swimming. :dunce:
mince
01-15-2008, 02:56 PM
played the "you show me yours, i show you mine" game with the neighborhood boys when we would go swimming. :dunce:
LOL i played that once. Although it was mainly her showing us hers, while we all sat giggling in the shrubs.
OLIAX
01-15-2008, 03:21 PM
I used to grab peoples boobs when I was a toddler
and I still do
mince
01-15-2008, 03:33 PM
Man boobs?
OLIAX
01-15-2008, 03:34 PM
Man boobs?
no dude. :squint:
what the fuck is wrong with you I should smack you upside the head for saying that
lmao
Telaso
01-15-2008, 04:16 PM
no dude. :squint:
what the fuck is wrong with you I should smack you upside the head for saying that
lmao
Man boobs have feelings too!!!!
MrLeft
01-18-2008, 08:28 PM
post some nasty shit you used to do (or still do) ...
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
Why in God's name would anyone be motivated to lick their cousin's dirty thong?
This can't be real.
Wow, and I thought it was bad when my friend told me about this guy he knew who licked his mothers dildo...
The whole dirty underwear thing isn't that far out of the norm...but the cousin thing...that brings it way out their.
and the deepthroating the dildo...hmmm yea, a bit strange too
CorneliusTapas
01-18-2008, 08:31 PM
I clapped my asscheeks in a babies face once. Let's see any of you beat that.
You sir, just made my sig.
SepulSchizo
01-18-2008, 08:44 PM
When I was in the second grade, I saw this older kid doing something strange on the monkey bars. It reminded me of what my uncle used to do around me sometimes. The perverted part about it is that I used to think about it as a teen and masturbate over it.
CorneliusTapas
01-18-2008, 08:49 PM
When I was in the second grade, I saw this older kid doing something strange on the monkey bars. It reminded me of what my uncle used to do around me sometimes. The perverted part about it is that I used to think about it as a teen and masturbate over it.
I see what you did there...:squint:
Ace Jack
01-18-2008, 09:43 PM
post some nasty shit you used to do (or still do) ...
when i was younger i used to go to my uncles house every summer and go swimming. now my cousin is hot, so one time while changing out of my wet bathing suit in the bathroom, i noticed a pile dirty laundry. sitting at the top of it was this thong. i realized that it was obviously my cousins (i hope) and being that she was hot, i did the only thing that any young boy in my situation would have done: sniff it.
so since that day, every time i used to go there for that entire summer i used to find her thongs and lick them/sniff them. but after a while though it got kinda boring, and i craved more pervertedness. so one day i told everyone i had to go to the bathroom (which happened to be right next to her room).. i used that excuse as cover but in reality i wanted to see the motherload of thongs...
so when i got into her room i checked her top drawer and there they were. i did the only reasonable thing at this point that anyone else would have done: took my pants off, put the thong of my choice on and jerked off. this became a sort of a ritual for me every week i would go there. i had quite the collection of cum stains going on in the corner of her room.
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go. after i took it out of my mouth i noticed there were some pubes on it so i got kinda grossed out
anyway all this came to an end because one time my aunt caught me in my cousins room...i told her i was looking for video games and she believed me, it was a close call though. aside from that, my cousin started locking her door..i guess she noticed that her thongs were being moved/or maybe that they started smelling like shit since they were inside my ass. either way she started locking her door and that was the end of that era.
your turn.
Epic.
Boss King > hateonme
jenkem
01-18-2008, 09:54 PM
I play 'you show me yours, I show you mine' game with the girls from the local elementary. I'm 45 years old...
dazevas
02-17-2008, 08:02 PM
i put peanut butter in my balls once and let my gfs dog lick it off.
Jeromiah
02-17-2008, 08:13 PM
when I was younger you know that ball sweat smell when you take a shower, well I would swoop the smell to my noise cause I knida liked the way it smells, and you know when your balls sweat I used to get a nice good sweaty finger and smell it a couple of times. Oh ya and I drink milk out of the container, and i used to beat off and shoot my load in a gold fish pot, with the gold fish init. it died after week 2.
sometimes i still swoop up that smell to my noise.
menace64
02-17-2008, 08:21 PM
when i was like 7-8 i would lay face down in the bath (with water ofc) and slide my cock up and down the base of the bath. I didn't masturbate at the time and it never led to a orgasm, it just felt good and i thought i was the only person in the world that could get that feeling :redface:
I did the same thing for what seems like years... and then one day - I kid you not - I turned over and thought, "Okay, now it's time to go Super Saiyan... take this to the next level!"
And then I jacked off for the first time. I was dumbfounded, and as I got closer to blasting my Kamehameha, I thought I was about to ascend to Super Saiyan Two.
How was I right. After I finished, I just stared at my cock and said, "Holy shit, what did I just do!?"
A week later, I'm still not sure what happened. Did I have sex?
Cheeseit
02-17-2008, 08:42 PM
i pissed in a supersoaker and hosed down my sister with it IN THE HOUSE
MadameX
02-17-2008, 09:57 PM
I used to dive behind this big pillow we had on our couch when I was about 6 years old and masturbate.
greg vs greg
02-17-2008, 10:41 PM
I did the same thing for what seems like years... and then one day - I kid you not - I turned over and thought, "Okay, now it's time to go Super Saiyan... take this to the next level!"
And then I jacked off for the first time. I was dumbfounded, and as I got closer to blasting my Kamehameha, I thought I was about to ascend to Super Saiyan Two.
How was I right. After I finished, I just stared at my cock and said, "Holy shit, what did I just do!?"
A week later, I'm still not sure what happened. Did I have sex?
Whenever our parents would have me clean our bathtub, I was too lazy to get a bucket of water, so I would just lick it clean.
Fuck you, brother. Fuck you.
This story is called "My First Girlfriend"
I used to be afraid of monsters under the bed when i was in elementary school. I always thought some hand would reach up and grab me. So I placed stuffed animals and toys all around the perimeter of the bed, and for some reason I thought this would be enough of a deterrent to stop a fucking monster. Well anyway, I would lie down in the middle of the bed with a wall of toys surrounding me, except for an old stuffed Minnie Mouse doll from when I was a baby. She would sleep right next to me sometimes, and I would kiss her and cuddle. It was adorable.
Father Max
02-17-2008, 10:45 PM
When I was in 1st grade I brought some kids back from the library and showed them how I would lay stomach down on the floor, then rub back and forth, making my dick feel good. I told them it was a type of push-up. It's weird because I never splooged or anything, but I still did it and it felt good.
willsk84food.
02-17-2008, 10:45 PM
the best part though is when i went one time, as i was searching through the drawer, my hand felt something very rubbery. i didnt know what it was so i pulled it out. it happened to be this dick shaped pink dildo. i couldnt believe it and i was shocked that i was holding this dildo. so at that point i did the only logical thing that anyone else would have done in my situation: tried to deepthroat it and see how far i could go.
your turn.
I am laughing so hard right now!:lmao::lmao::lmao:
Edit: I used to dry hump with my girlfriend when i was like 6. Naked. Fun.
that1guy
02-17-2008, 11:50 PM
LOL FAG
10 LOL FAGs
Queenbunnywitch
02-18-2008, 10:47 AM
Whenever our parents would have me clean our bathtub, I was too lazy to get a bucket of water, so I would just lick it clean.
Fuck you, brother. Fuck you.
This story is called "My First Girlfriend"
I used to be afraid of monsters under the bed when i was in elementary school. I always thought some hand would reach up and grab me. So I placed stuffed animals and toys all around the perimeter of the bed, and for some reason I thought this would be enough of a deterrent to stop a fucking monster. Well anyway, I would lie down in the middle of the bed with a wall of toys surrounding me, except for an old stuffed Minnie Mouse doll from when I was a baby. She would sleep right next to me sometimes, and I would kiss her and cuddle. It was adorable.
lol i had a stuffed animal army too, i had the top bunk of a bunk bed and i had the stuffed animals bordering my whole bed.
AquaXed
02-18-2008, 10:59 AM
When I was in the 1st grade, I was lying in bed one night when I was fantasizing about the sex scene from "Titanic" so I rubbed my crotch, as I obviously hadn't gotten the stroking the dick part figured out yet. The next day, I wet my bed.
glotwp55
02-18-2008, 11:14 AM
God this thread is pure gold. When I was like 8, I stuck my dick in a gigantic stuffed version of Flounder from the Little Mermaid that I won from a McDonalds. The one fin got ripped off so there was an open whole to the soft white stuff inside that I though would feel good. Boy was I wrong, the shit was like sand paper. :lmao:
razorwire61
02-18-2008, 04:16 PM
when i was 7 my next door neighbour used to babysit me and my sister and they had a daughter who was a year younger than me and we'd always go to the basement and play old Super nintendo. i dont know how it was started but we used to play naked and whenever we heard her mom comming we'd get dressed quickly. we did this for like a week untill we got curious and wanted to touch eachother each day. all this time my sister was in the room and she eventually told on us and ruined all the fun. my dad had a huge talk with me about how sex was wrong at my age and stuff and it fucked me up cus when i was older was always subconciosuly afraid to do stuff with ladies as much as i wanted to because i got in troube that one time... i know its not wrong now or nothing but its just starting to be fixed.
pretty shitty had to see a shrink
Daucus Karota
02-18-2008, 04:22 PM
I stuck one of my cousins barbie dolls up my own ass!
it hurt
rerat
02-18-2008, 04:23 PM
I stuck one of my cousins barbie dolls up my own ass!
it hurt
...and a Scandinavian flamer was borned.
jtwg
02-19-2008, 07:38 PM
When I was like 4 I would take a FACE cloth that was in our shower when I was taking a shower or bath and I would wrap it arouns my underwear area like a diaper and then when it was covering my ass and dick I could slap the part that was covering my balls. Oh and for about a month when I was like 8 I would wipe my ass and throw the tissue paper in the garbage instead of in the tolite and the bathroom smelled like shit 24/7
Dont judge me.
EDIT: Also sometimes when I just woke up and some one was in the shower, If i needed to take a piss, I would just piss all over my carpet and I would try to spread it out evenly.
/Δ\
02-19-2008, 07:45 PM
I used to steal my father's Rolling Stone magazines. I particularly favored thw one with Christina Aguilera lying down nude on the front cover holding a guitar. But I lost that one.
kingofallmedia
02-19-2008, 10:54 PM
Dont judge me.
i judged, sorry
shahab6
02-20-2008, 12:22 AM
When I was 11, and my cousin was 12, at my grandmother's house while we were in the same bed, I rubbed her vagina, breast and legs, and she was feeling on my penis.
bonenator
02-20-2008, 12:59 AM
me and my friends in california (was in kindergarte-1st grade) would wait till my friends older (15)yr old sister was changing and open the door really fast so we could see her naked. it was hot
Stomach Content
02-20-2008, 01:04 AM
When ever i was eating coco pops, i pictures the pops as people in boats and i used to laught at them cos im eating all these people in my bowl. I was like , your not getting away.
Trent215
02-20-2008, 01:07 AM
When I was 5 I would bang my hot ass milf neighbor...rich husband so she had the fake tittys and rode cock well
razorwire61
02-20-2008, 01:19 AM
^^^^^ me too
davido
02-20-2008, 02:23 PM
i put peanut butter in my balls once and let my gfs dog lick it off.
This is not a one time thing.:raiseeyeb
heartagram89
02-20-2008, 03:36 PM
When ever i was eating coco pops, i pictures the pops as people in boats and i used to laught at them cos im eating all these people in my bowl. I was like , your not getting away.
LMFAO!! :lmao:
Lemoritz
02-20-2008, 06:57 PM
I peed inside my own butt.
PantySnatcher is my favorite member hands down.
His Avatar is hilarious and his posts are hilarious. Quality shit.
Twiceasnice45
02-20-2008, 07:18 PM
i am starting to realize there are a lot of gay muthas on this board. A lot of homo shit going down in your lives.
Whatabum
02-20-2008, 07:28 PM
I was staying around my granddads house and my step-aunty(a year younger than me and not blood related at all) was sleeping in the same bed as me, i stuck my penis in her mouth while she was asleep then came on her face... i would do this again.
oh and just remembered another one.
Me and my cousin were playing monopoly around his house, for some reason both of our parents had gone out without telling us and the door was locked to the room so we were trapped in... i needed a piss really bad so i just went on the carpet, my cousin thought his was hilarious and he did it to... i only went there once.
PabloHoney
02-20-2008, 07:35 PM
i am starting to realize there are a lot of gay muthas on this board. A lot of homo shit going down in your lives.
People are gay, Get over it.
liquidz5
02-20-2008, 08:02 PM
masturbated over neighbour.OH LAWD SHE IS HAWT MILF!
doped_up_hobo
02-20-2008, 08:09 PM
i pissed in a supersoaker and hosed down my sister with it IN THE HOUSE
that just made me think back to when i was 13, i got up in the middle of the night and needed a piss, i don't know what the hell possesed me to do it, but i pissed all over my sleeping sisters head. when i was done i took a moment to think about what i did and i literally started to ROTFL. then she woke up and the look on her face made me nearly fucking die of laughter. oh maaaan. my dad beat the crap out of me. was worth it, the memory of such laughter just makes me laugh again.
also the nieghborhood i lived in when i was 3-6, was filled with little kids who were sex fiends. i got raped by an 11 year old girl! when i think about it it's fucking bizzare. there was even a little prozzie, seriously, everyone had dry humped her.
Mattjam
02-20-2008, 08:25 PM
i am starting to realize there are a lot of gay muthas on this board. A lot of homo shit going down in your lives.
Your sig. A word is spelled wrong. I'll leave it to you to find which one.
ST4NK
02-20-2008, 11:45 PM
This thread is epic.
that1guy
02-20-2008, 11:54 PM
i licked hot sauce off some random guys nipples
jenkem
02-20-2008, 11:56 PM
I used to visit this teen puberty forum and masturbate to what the girl's had done. Sometimes, they would put anecdotes about their first shower head, Zucchini, Cucumber, or banana.
Those were the days. *sigh*
Nimnom
02-21-2008, 12:17 AM
Good video on the subject:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=MbOQXV_AZgY
Frood
02-21-2008, 12:27 AM
When I was six(ish) and my parents made me go to Church I would get bored so one time I decided to play a new game with myself. I would stick my penis out the waistband and see how long I could keep the tip out before I thought somebody was looking. Not that perverted, but kind of weird.
Nefarious
02-22-2008, 12:31 AM
When I was 10 or 11 my baby sitter and I watched the spice channel and she asked if i wanted to do to her what was on tv and that was eat her out. I was like ok, so i ate her pussy and fucked her. It was really akward because i didnt know what i was doing and it was my first time.
I remember when i was a kid like 5 or 6 my baby sitter who was like 15 or 16 would breast feed me. I guess she got her jollies off by having a 6 yearold suck her tits.
I remember last year when i had to get a physical for a job i was waiting in the reception room for the doctor to give me a full psysical and this hot chick walked in and for some reason i just got this massive boner then the doctor called my name a few seconds later and brought me into the examination room and told me to undress and put on this gown, she left but i still had this massive boner and only thinking about it made it worse then the doctor comes in and gives me a hernia exame she was like "dont worry thats a perfectly normal response" i was glad it was a female doctor.
I remember when I was like 20 and I worked at this sex shop called lovers lane and this mid 50 ish lady came in and she was a sex freak and was talking to me about all this crazy sex shit and how she has sex parties and swings all the time. The lady goes into the dressing room to try on some langere then sticks her head out and calls for me to go into the room. The other employee chick i was fucking at the time goes into the room and the lady asked if my fuck toy friend would suck on her titties and finger her asshole but she didnt. Me and my fuck toy friend wanted to get drunk that day at work but we werent 21 yet so we I asked the freaky lady if she would buy us alcohol and she said ok so i went with her and she got us the booze for free but she asked me if i would stick the ass beads she just bought in her ass and suck her titts while she gave me a hand job for 50 bucks and i was like OK. Then I went back to the store and my fucktoy friend was like "did you fuck that lady" i was like "hell no".
Oh and one time at a house party i hooked up with this one chick and fucked her nasty stlye with no jimmy hat and when i was about to cum i pulled out and busted this massive load that shot far as hell, I got part of her face, the back board of the bed and alot of it went on the wall and the night stand. Its funny how far you can shoot a load when its good pussy.
I stold this kids car one time when he was passed out drunk at my crib and i was with this one chick just driving around getting drunk and i was like "give me some head" so she sucked my dick off and then i busted a nutt all over this dudes control pannel and cd player.
I dont know if any of that shit is perverted but its fucked up.
good times!
Secsy_Banana
02-22-2008, 02:45 PM
One time, when I was like 13, I was bored and decided to masturbate. But this time I found a world records book and it had a picture of Jennifer Aniston in it, so I cummed on her picture, in a book..It was pretty fucked up.
DaDigits
02-22-2008, 04:54 PM
I used to visit this teen puberty forum and masturbate to what the girl's had done. Sometimes, they would put anecdotes about their first shower head, Zucchini, Cucumber, or banana.
Those were the days. *sigh*
LINK! NOW!
Ham Rove
02-22-2008, 04:56 PM
LINK! NOW!
:lol: I was thinking the same thing. sounds like a neat place
CoyoteUgly71
02-22-2008, 05:34 PM
you expect us to believe you tried to deepthroat a dildo?
strikeandburn
02-22-2008, 05:49 PM
I used to visit this teen puberty forum and masturbate to what the girl's had done. Sometimes, they would put anecdotes about their first shower head, Zucchini, Cucumber, or banana.
Those were the days. *sigh*
Your not alone! :raiseeyeb
teh_hyena
02-22-2008, 09:10 PM
my sister was having a sleepover with her friends, while they were sleeping i began to beat off and blasted a gooey stream right in one of her friends mouth
bonenator
02-22-2008, 09:14 PM
bullshit not buyin it
Osiris5217
02-23-2008, 01:17 AM
Back in 1st grade I had these shorts that were really too short (a whore would wear shorts these short) and there was a small hole at the crotch. Anyways, during class when I would get bored I would pull some of my ballsack through the hole.
To make a long story short, it stopped after my teacher caught me doing it.
Nefarious
02-23-2008, 02:15 AM
The ony perverted thing i have ever done was try to suck my own dick....I made it to my tip and could of sucked the whole fuck up but it wasnt all that apealing. I just waned to see if i could do it. I could realistically give my self a half a blow job if i wanted to.
bonenator
02-23-2008, 02:28 AM
Back in 1st grade I had these shorts that were really too short (a whore would wear shorts these short) and there was a small hole at the crotch. Anyways, during class when I would get bored I would pull some of my ballsack through the hole.
To make a long story short, it stopped after my teacher caught me doing it.
:lmao::lmao:lmao
Burnt Socks
02-23-2008, 03:49 AM
I was 14 at the time when I stuck a GI-Joe action figure up my ass, then I gave it to one of the neighborhood kids to play with. He was pretty happy when he I gave it to him, I let it sit for 2 weeks so it wouldn't stink. Jokes on him lol.
bonenator
02-23-2008, 07:14 AM
dude whaaaat
Baldman
03-11-2008, 10:13 AM
This thread is beyond epic. First page.
10firstpages
Ari Gold
03-11-2008, 10:48 AM
To this day I still jerk off with sand paper gloves to my own baby picture.
xDojo
04-04-2008, 12:37 AM
bump, this is good
teh_hyena
04-04-2008, 12:42 AM
i would draw smiley faces on my cock like --->
and put my cousins barbie dresses on my shaft and give it a personality.SwyfT
04-04-2008, 01:01 AM
i would draw smiley faces on my cock like --->
and put my cousins barbie dresses on my shaft and give it a personality.Quoted for Quality (QfQ)
When I was 10 this 7 year old girl I was babysat with would find any way she could to sit on me... naked.
Travman93
04-04-2008, 01:02 AM
When I was 4 and my cousin was 6, she was like "I saw this on TV. Take off your underwear." So I did, but I did it in the clauset. Then she said lay down and I did and she like laid over me and my grandpa came in and goes "WTF GET OUT OF HERE TRAVIS!!!"
TopRightCorner
04-04-2008, 01:03 AM
Me and my sister's doll had a thing for a while.
rambino
04-04-2008, 09:10 AM
These are child porn stories.. u Pedos!
duel
04-04-2008, 10:29 AM
When you're really little, you can get away with going in the other sexes changing rooms, toilets and showers at sport centres and other places.
I used to watch the women and get a boner, rub my cock and bend it a bit.
I also used to fuck sleeping bags
I.H.E.
04-04-2008, 11:31 AM
During the summer when I was 15 or 16 my mom and dad used to work all day and I just stayed home by myself. There was a girl who was about 8 or 9 who lived next door, and sometimes if her mom had to go out for a little while she'd just have me keep an eye on her. One day I was watching her and we were swimming in the pool in my backyard, but she couldn't swim very well, so she kept hanging on to me. She'd throw her arms around me and thrash around, and then her leg rubbed on my dick. She asked what it was, and I told her it was my privates. She said she never seen a penis before, and wanted to see mine.
I knew what I was about to do was wrong, but damn... this little 8 year old girl was hot. So I said ok, let's go inside and dry off, then I'll show you. So we went inside and dried off, and I told her ok, you can see it now. I pulled my shorts down, and showed her my raging hard on. I asked if she wanted to touch it, and she said yes. I showed her how to stroke it so it felt good, and she did. I asked her if she wanted to taste it, and she said yes. So she put it in her mouth and started giving me an awesome blowjob. I pulled out and started cumming all over this cute little 8 year olds face, when all of a sudden my mom walked in on us. Boy, was she upset. I molested one little girl and my mom got scared and said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in bel air.
The_Guitarist
04-04-2008, 02:14 PM
During the summer when I was 15 or 16 my mom and dad used to work all day and I just stayed home by myself. There was a girl who was about 8 or 9 who lived next door, and sometimes if her mom had to go out for a little while she'd just have me keep an eye on her. One day I was watching her and we were swimming in the pool in my backyard, but she couldn't swim very well, so she kept hanging on to me. She'd throw her arms around me and thrash around, and then her leg rubbed on my dick. She asked what it was, and I told her it was my privates. She said she never seen a penis before, and wanted to see mine.
I knew what I was about to do was wrong, but damn... this little 8 year old girl was hot. So I said ok, let's go inside and dry off, then I'll show you. So we went inside and dried off, and I told her ok, you can see it now. I pulled my shorts down, and showed her my raging hard on. I asked if she wanted to touch it, and she said yes. I showed her how to stroke it so it felt good, and she did. I asked her if she wanted to taste it, and she said yes. So she put it in her mouth and started giving me an awesome blowjob. I pulled out and started cumming all over this cute little 8 year olds face, when all of a sudden my mom walked in on us. Boy, was she upset. I molested one little girl and my mom got scared and said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in bel air.
*fap fap felp*
FlyinG ShoosteR
04-04-2008, 02:17 PM
This thread delivers.
Queenbunnywitch
04-04-2008, 04:15 PM
Ya know. I think i might have been molested when I was younger. I dont mean by my stepdad i know that happened. But i vaguely remember when my mom left me in the care of this lady that also took care of 3 or 4 other kids. I think I was the youngest. Anyway, there was this kid, I dont remember if it was a boy or girl but it took me like under the bed. I had to have been in pampers cuz i remember the kid pulling down my pamper and rubbing its genitals on mine. Then I remember it being time to eat and some other kid came to call us to eat but couldnt find us. I remember thinking it was a game and wanting to laugh. I dunno if that was a dream I had but if i dreamed that as a kid thats pretty fucked up.
Jeromiah
04-04-2008, 06:08 PM
Ya know. I think i might have been molested when I was younger. I dont mean by my stepdad i know that happened. But i vaguely remember when my mom left me in the care of this lady that also took care of 3 or 4 other kids. I think I was the youngest. Anyway, there was this kid, I dont remember if it was a boy or girl but it took me like under the bed. I had to have been in pampers cuz i remember the kid pulling down my pamper and rubbing its genitals on mine. Then I remember it being time to eat and some other kid came to call us to eat but couldnt find us. I remember thinking it was a game and wanting to laugh. I dunno if that was a dream I had but if i dreamed that as a kid thats pretty fucked up.
THAT WAS YOU!? OMG, finaly we meet againg.
Osama Bin Laden
04-04-2008, 07:41 PM
Dammit, so you were under the bed when i couldnt find you when it was time to eat. assholes
Fag Boy
04-05-2008, 03:08 AM
In chronological order starting at about 5, not sure if all of these are perverted, but they are weird none the less so I will put them in.
You know those big 4ft barbies they used to have, life sized barbie or something like that. Well my sister had and me and the Barbie got naked and I laid on top of it and made out with it, not sure why.
I had this uncanny habit of taking a dump in my toy box, my dad always found it soon after, but I would just deny it, thinking he might think it was my mom or something.
Around that age me and a friend where watching terminator, i think, and we kept rewinding the sex scene, and my mom walked in and yelled at us, and I just told here we were trying to learn.
A friend stayed over and fell asleep before me, so I rubbed a keychain on his cock, and in the morning told him to put it in his mouth, without giving a reason. He did it, and then I told him what I had done, and we laughed, mainly because we didn’t realize how fucking gay that was.
My neighbor’s house was maybe 6 feet away from mine, and they would leave the window midway up their stairway open, and I would piss out the second floor window of my room, into their window, on probably a weekly basis, until one night I was doing it, and the lights turned on in their living room.
This one is pretty normal. I would straddle the side of a couch and hump and rub my dick all over it. The wierd part is I would do this when other people were in the room, mainly my brothers, until one day I did it when my mom was in the room and she yelled at me.
One summer afternoon we were eating dinner and I was eating some corn on the cob. After I finished all the kernels, I started sucking at the cob. It wasn’t a normal suck, like you would do to your fingers after a good bag of chips. I was working that cob like the dirtiest whores work a cock. Everyone laughed at me, but I just kept on sucking. On a scale of 1-10 of awesome blowjobs, the work being done on that cob was at least a 9. I long for the day when I can get a blowjob the way I sucked on the corn cob.
now im around the age of 10
me and a friend had a sleepover, and for some reason we wanted to role play where one of us would pretend to be and abusive husband and the other the wife. I started the game by coming and telling her(him) to get on the bed, where I proceeded to "dry" rape her(him) doggystyle. Then it was his turn, and we just kept on alternating, trying different positions for about an hour. I could feel his wiener poking me in my butt.
Around 5th grade I had this girl in my class that was my "girlfriend" and this was off and on. One week we would be holding hands at lunch, and the next week I would put dog shit in a plastic baggy and put it inside here desk at school.
During 5th grade I discovered masturbation, and at night on the top of my bunk bed with my brother below me, I would pull my dick out and put it through the hole in my underwear(but not the pee hole, the hole I had ripped open from skidmarks) and jerk of with it. I referred to this nightly event as "The Mass Masturbation". I slept with the door open as did my sister, and one night I realized that there was a perfect line of sight from my sisters bed to my bed across the hall, and thats when I stopped doing that.
I was somewhat of a class clown in school and would often get sent in the hallway almost daily, and the majority of the time this happened I would rub one out while sitting in the chair. This was dangerous, because someone could just turn the corner, and I wouldnt hear it coming. Once after I had done this and was back in class, some girl was like "you having something on the side of your pants" and tried to rub it off, and i joked and said "Oh, thats just cum", and she laughed.
Had another dry humping incident at a different friends house, but this one involved a third person, and lasted much longer, and ill just leave that one at that.
I used to make fake anonymous email accounts when I was like 13 and send pictures of my cock to girls at school asking them they thought it was big.
thats enough for now.
D3mko
04-05-2008, 04:11 AM
Some of you have some issues...
Shit...
Go see a shrink?
sprayin
04-06-2008, 12:49 AM
when i was yunger i pissed on a pokemon card and put it in my floppy disk drive cause i thought it would turn into a hollow one the more valuable ones
teh_hyena
04-06-2008, 01:00 AM
when i was yunger i pissed on a pokemon card and put it in my floppy disk drive cause i thought it would turn into a hollow one the more valuable ones
i laffed.hard
FuNkYFreSH
04-06-2008, 01:00 AM
when I was 10 I use to watch my best friend's sister (16) change clothes. He use to check out his own sister too
sprayin
04-06-2008, 01:07 AM
i laffed.hard
it didnt work so dont try it dude
proton
04-06-2008, 01:13 AM
When I was maybe 5 or so, my mother took me over to a nieghbours house for coffee and chit chat. This woman was doing dishes in her nightgown. So, feeling a bit randy, I got on the floor with my View Master (Link to pic if your not familiar (http://www.edcenter.sdsu.edu/cs575viz/viewmaster.gif)) and slowly made my way across the floor on my back untill I was close enough to look up her nightgown. To my suprise, she wasn't wearing any panties. So here I am clicking away at my viewmaster (Mickey Mouse if I remember correctly) and getting my first real look at ass and pussy. Good times.
whistlingpoop
04-06-2008, 02:48 AM
I use to have my guy cousin over every weekend to go swimming. After he used my bathroom for the first time I noticed that there were skid marks on my thongs. So I thought I would show him a lesson and put this old gay mans pink dildo that had mushrooms growing out of his ass from some weird disease. So I put it in my drawer I think there were a few of his ass pubes left over on it though and me an my mom watched him deepthroat it. I also just took my thongs and put them in my closet. Then put this other chick I know who had vagina cottage cheese disease and put them in my drawer. Then I found cum stains on the carpet so I started locking my door.
iMAC90
04-06-2008, 03:14 AM
Well when i was 5 years old i heated up the cars cigarette lighter and i pushed it against my thumb..i didnt react for a few seconds until i noticed my skin peel off
wasnt perverted but was it worth reading?
lorddread
04-06-2008, 03:18 AM
I had sex with yo momma
iMAC90
04-06-2008, 09:45 PM
download moar ram.
RorShap
04-06-2008, 09:49 PM
I would run around the house with my weener out.
Sometimes me and my friend would slap weeners and have weeners fights. Back then it was cool but now that i think about it its pretty nasty.
It's 3AM and I think I just woke my entire family up with laughter. Fuck you, you evil weiner warrior you.
As for me, I would sometimes sleep naked with my toys cars. Automobiliality.
Yeti Patrol
04-06-2008, 10:37 PM
I used to drag my ass across the living room floor.
jenkem
04-06-2008, 10:45 PM
I used to drag my ass across the living room floor.
My dog drags his balls across the floor.
Father Max
04-06-2008, 10:47 PM
I used to rub my dick through my pants during school when I was in second grade, but it ending when the girl next to me asked if I needed to go pee.
The_Guitarist
04-06-2008, 10:48 PM
My dog drags his balls across the floor.
My dog drags his balls across my ass.
jenkem
04-06-2008, 10:49 PM
My dog drags his balls across my ass.
In Soviet Russia, floors drag you across.
The_Guitarist
04-06-2008, 10:50 PM
In Soviet Russia, floors drag you across.
In communist China you don't get a floor.
jenkem
04-06-2008, 11:10 PM
In communist China you don't get a floor.
You do if you bribe the government. Corruption at it's finest.
TheMuffinMan
04-07-2008, 12:47 AM
My neighbor’s house was maybe 6 feet away from mine, and they would leave the window midway up their stairway open, and I would piss out the second floor window of my room, into their window, on probably a weekly basis, until one night I was doing it, and the lights turned on in their living room.
aahaahahahahahahah
RoastBRAIN
04-07-2008, 01:11 AM
I used to rub my dick through my pants during school when I was in second grade, but it ending when the girl next to me asked if I needed to go pee.You musta have had fleas or something and thats why you scratched.
You wernt masterbating or doing anything sexual for your concern cos you were not even at that level to know anything about what sexual is.
I didnt know what porn was until i was in year 7. Someone told me.
Crazy Gnome
04-07-2008, 06:34 PM
Me and my best friend had set up this tent in his basement when I was like seven. His sister who was a year younger than me had a huge crush on me. I had seen her naked before because we bathed together a few times in our younger days. But for some reason in this basement tent she let everything fly. She pretty much forced me to finger her. I also made out with her and hit second base a few times. One day she pulled my pants down and grabbed my dick and thats when I put a stop to the "naked club" as we called it. Looking back on it now it was very strange when my friend(her brother) used to dry hump her when she was naked showing us what he had seen on cinimax.
Also once at the age of eleven I jerked off for about 20 minuets once in a pool underneath my bathing suit. It was the middle of suburbia and probably all the neighbors were watching me do it but I never came.
Murray_Lips
04-07-2008, 08:04 PM
Murray_Lips
04-07-2008, 08:04 PM
When I was like 11 me and 2 of my male buddies had a long dry-humping session in my living room. It seemed like a good idea at the time, beats playstation any day.
I'm pretty sure at one point we were pulling a train.
Father Max
04-07-2008, 08:08 PM
You musta have had fleas or something and thats why you scratched.
You wernt masterbating or doing anything sexual for your concern cos you were not even at that level to know anything about what sexual is.
I didnt know what porn was until i was in year 7. Someone told me.
Actually rubbing my dick felt good back then. I never came or anything, but it always felt good.
lovestospooge
04-09-2008, 07:09 PM
i used to crawl under the table in primary school and look at the girls underwear because they all wore skirts with their legs wide open
in primary school we all got changed for p.e in the same room so i watched the girls
primary school was a good time...
kingofallmedia
04-09-2008, 07:37 PM
^^^^ lol that would be a lawsuit if it was allowed today
Murray_Lips
04-09-2008, 07:39 PM
^^^^ lol that would be a lawsuit if it was allowed today
Only if you get caught, amateurs.
PokemonMaster
04-09-2008, 07:44 PM
This thread cause many many boners.
aooga12
04-09-2008, 08:04 PM
I once walked in on my 78 year old grandma undressing... she had just her underwear on
Just thought I would throw that in!
same here man.... GOD i was disgusted...
i pissed in a supersoaker and hosed down my sister with it IN THE HOUSE
i did that too!! my next door dickhead though tea in a supersoaker is funny, so i pissed in mine and mixed with lemonaid, and got him right in the mouth... i then went to fighiting him 20 minutes later with a 1 hit ko...
DaDigits
04-10-2008, 12:24 AM
When I was in 4th grade I used to pretend to accedently drop my pencil under the table (there would be like six kids to a table) and look up the girls skirts....if they wore a skirt most of the time I was foiled by jeans! DAMN YOU LEVI STRUSSE! Any who I always thought I was super secretive about it but I stopped doing it when a girl sitting across from me asked me why I kept dropping my pencil. I lied as said cause I was avoiding the work.
Also when I four I would take shits in the dog run on the side of the house because I would see the dogs do it and thought it was OK.
teh_hyena
04-10-2008, 12:28 AM
When I was in 4th grade I used to pretend to accedently drop my pencil under the table (there would be like six kids to a table) and look up the girls skirts....if they wore a skirt most of the time I was foiled by jeans! DAMN YOU LEVI STRUSSE! Any who I always thought I was super secretive about it but I stopped doing it when a girl sitting across from me asked me why I kept dropping my pencil. I lied as said cause I was avoiding the work.
i got a hilarious mental image from this.
Anarchology
04-10-2008, 01:39 AM
Me and my best friend had set up this tent in his basement when I was like seven. His sister who was a year younger than me had a huge crush on me. I had seen her naked before because we bathed together a few times in our younger days. But for some reason in this basement tent she let everything fly. She pretty much forced me to finger her. I also made out with her and hit second base a few times. One day she pulled my pants down and grabbed my dick and thats when I put a stop to the "naked club" as we called it. Looking back on it now it was very strange when my friend(her brother) used to dry hump her when she was naked showing us what he had seen on cinimax.
Hahaha, thats fucking awesome. The brother rubbing up on the sis was a little weird. Looks like Skinamax is for all ages!
Achillies
04-10-2008, 01:49 AM
I used to fuck a bottle of water, thinking that's what it's like inside a twat. All that did really was make it taste funny.
FlavaDave
04-10-2008, 03:04 AM
when i was like 5 i had 'private time' with my next door neighbour
im pretty sure we both put our dicks in each others mouths
we refuse to talk about it
i think it scarred me for life...
Lord Vollum
04-10-2008, 09:41 PM
I am really starting to think you're a troll.
jtwg
04-10-2008, 09:51 PM
When I was like 8 me and my friend were having a sleep over and we were sleeping in the same bed and I had a raging boner and I pulled it out and showed him, I pulled my balls over it and then was like, its not gay you can only see skin you can't see the purple part.
FlavaDave
04-11-2008, 04:23 AM
I am really starting to think you're a troll.
wtf is a troll
DoubleAey
04-11-2008, 04:32 PM
i remember, everytime someone would fart, my lil brother would run up behind them and stick his face in their ass and sniff their farts up... he said he enjoyed the smells. it lasted a year until one day my dad shat himself while my brother was sniffing and he felt it on his face.
HAHAHAHAHHAAH
i laugh at him.
whistlingpoop
04-12-2008, 04:31 AM
I use to bring popsicle sticks with me everytime I went poop. Because I would stick the poop on the popsicle stick and lick it. Then one day I decided to bring some with me to school. When I got in the bathroom I couldn't poop so I just found one lying around the floor and put it on the stick. When I came back into the classroom I gave all 4 of the poop on stickd to kids to eat and just told them it was a new lolipop. Then the teacher just stared at us from her desk while we were eating an licking it.
Dayve
04-12-2008, 04:50 AM
When i was 6 me and my mom used to live right across the road from one of her old school friends who had 2 daughters. She'd go over there every day to talk about useless shit that women talk about for 4 hours and i'd go upstairs and play with her daughters.
Long story short, i was 6 years old, they were 6 and 7, i couldn't even get a hardon and all 3 of us used to hide under the blankets of their beds and take turns kissing.
I GOT MORE PUSSY WHEN I WAS 6 THAN I DO NOW AT 19!
We still live close, maybe i'll knock on their house one day and see if they want to play like we used to play when we were 6.
Oh and i also used to drop pencils under the tables at school so i could look up girls skirts... I was 5-6 at the time.
DaDigits
04-12-2008, 05:12 AM
I used to fuck a bottle of water, thinking that's what it's like inside a twat. All that did really was make it taste funny.
You got one small prick if it can fit into a water bottle.
Boss_King
04-12-2008, 07:05 AM
I used to fuck a bottle of water, thinking that's what it's like inside a twat. All that did really was make it taste funny.
i used to do the same thing, i used them as primitive penis pumps...i tried to make my dick bigger:dunce:
Achillies
04-12-2008, 09:26 PM
You got one small prick if it can fit into a water bottle.
Yeah, but what a confidence builder. In the bottle it looked really big and bulky.
thejoelmister
04-13-2008, 10:02 PM
your dick can fit into a bottle of water?
ftbllplr
04-13-2008, 10:19 PM
Sometimes I'd do that, except with a mason jar.
Achillies
04-14-2008, 03:00 AM
Yeah, it fitted fine. No complaints.
dazevas
04-14-2008, 03:01 AM
i once tried to fit it in a gatorade bottle but failed.
Rico_Suave
06-07-2008, 09:16 PM
I used to make fake anonymous email accounts when I was like 13 and send pictures of my cock to girls at school asking them they thought it was big.
thats enough for now.
