Is divorce good or bad?

glen_mark_ledesma · Jul 23, 2011

Well here in the Philippines it is not been legalized or practice in our present government and many anti's are obstructing to make it happen. Do you really think that divorce can help or just worsen more the scenario for every broken families and marriage?

mixa94 · Jul 23, 2011

glen_mark_ledesma said:
Well here in the Philippines it is not been legalized or practice in our present government and many anti's are obstructing to make it happen. Do you really think that divorce can help or just worsen more the scenario for every broken families and marriage?

Well it depends...It the couple is fighting a lot maybe its better to have a divorce , but if they have children its better to straight out their issues for their kids sake...they shouldn't make their kids depressed .

glen_mark_ledesma · Jul 23, 2011

mixa94 said:
Well it depends...It the couple is fighting a lot maybe its better to have a divorce , but if they have children its better to straight out their issues for their kids sake...they shouldn't make their kids depressed .

You got a point buddy, but let me rephrase what I said, we have shariah court here in the Philippines that allows divorce for muslims. Let me explain you further:

Many people are surprised to learn that divorce is allowed in Islam. After all, Islam is so strict and rigid in many ways, why would divorce be allowed?

Marriage is Allah's gift to mankind. It offers peace and security, physical pleasure and children. Marriage is meant to nurture the soul. While no one is happy all the time, marriage in general should bring happiness and fulfillment to both parties. Marriage is the center of the family, and also its thermometer. When the marriage is strong, the family flourishes. When it is weak, however, the entire family suffers.

Allah, in His infinite, wisdom, recognized that some people would be ill-suited for one another. Rather than force them to live together in a farce of a marriage, divorce is allowed. However, divorce is not something to be taken lightly; it is to be used as a last resort. In fact, getting a divorce without a valid reason is considered a sin. In a hadith reported by Abu Dawud, Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) said, "Among lawful things, divorce is most hated by Allah."

Although the phrase "irreconcilable differences" is overused in our culture, those are the only differences that would necessitate a divorce. If there is hope of reconciliation, you must seek that first. Divorce should not even be considered until all positive avenues have been explored. Only problems that cause such anger, bitterness, and hatred that marriage becomes impossible should lead to divorce.

Obviously, that could vary from person to person and marriage to marriage. Clearly, though, petty differences or boredom are not legitimate grounds. Most marriages do have moments of boredom, where the spark has gone. That is just motivation to spice things up! Running away and destroying a family will not solve that problem.
Infidelity, on the other hand, could definitely be a breaking point for many people, although many couples have managed to survive an affair. Abuse of any kind is certainly cause for divorce, unless the abuser enters a treatment program and fully repents. Refusal of one spouse to fulfill his or her marital duties could be a legitimate cause for divorce. For example, if a husband refuses to work and support the family, the wife would be justified in seeking a divorce if all efforts to change his mind have failed. Likewise, a wife who refuses to share the marital bed could likely find herself divorced, barring medical problems.
In all cases, marital harmony should be attempted. If all efforts have been made to restore happiness and peace, then you may seek divorce.

mixa94 · Jul 23, 2011

glen_mark_ledesma said:
You got a point buddy, but let me rephrase what I said, we have shariah court here in the Philippines that allows divorce for muslims. Let me explain you further:

Many people are surprised to learn that divorce is allowed in Islam. After all, Islam is so strict and rigid in many ways, why would divorce be allowed?

Marriage is Allah's gift to mankind. It offers peace and security, physical pleasure and children. Marriage is meant to nurture the soul. While no one is happy all the time, marriage in general should bring happiness and fulfillment to both parties. Marriage is the center of the family, and also its thermometer. When the marriage is strong, the family flourishes. When it is weak, however, the entire family suffers.

Allah, in His infinite, wisdom, recognized that some people would be ill-suited for one another. Rather than force them to live together in a farce of a marriage, divorce is allowed. However, divorce is not something to be taken lightly; it is to be used as a last resort. In fact, getting a divorce without a valid reason is considered a sin. In a hadith reported by Abu Dawud, Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) said, "Among lawful things, divorce is most hated by Allah."

Although the phrase "irreconcilable differences" is overused in our culture, those are the only differences that would necessitate a divorce. If there is hope of reconciliation, you must seek that first. Divorce should not even be considered until all positive avenues have been explored. Only problems that cause such anger, bitterness, and hatred that marriage becomes impossible should lead to divorce.

Obviously, that could vary from person to person and marriage to marriage. Clearly, though, petty differences or boredom are not legitimate grounds. Most marriages do have moments of boredom, where the spark has gone. That is just motivation to spice things up! Running away and destroying a family will not solve that problem.
Infidelity, on the other hand, could definitely be a breaking point for many people, although many couples have managed to survive an affair. Abuse of any kind is certainly cause for divorce, unless the abuser enters a treatment program and fully repents. Refusal of one spouse to fulfill his or her marital duties could be a legitimate cause for divorce. For example, if a husband refuses to work and support the family, the wife would be justified in seeking a divorce if all efforts to change his mind have failed. Likewise, a wife who refuses to share the marital bed could likely find herself divorced, barring medical problems.
In all cases, marital harmony should be attempted. If all efforts have been made to restore happiness and peace, then you may seek divorce.

Oh i see now, well that is quite different and you have right in that.

speedy · Jul 23, 2011

glen_mark_ledesma said:
Well here in the Philippines it is not been legalized or practice in our present government and many anti's are obstructing to make it happen. Do you really think that divorce can help or just worsen more the scenario for every broken families and marriage?

Christians have always a bad impression about divorced because of its effects to the children as well as the sacredness of marriage. But in our society today were there are people who got married for other reasons than loving each other divorced is always the exit. Nothing is bad in divorce as long as the government or anybody who will scrutinize each issue is not too lenient in implementing it. It should be applied to those abusive spouse and only if the situation is out of control that involves physical abuse, threats, etc. But filing a divorce because the husband or the wife is attracted and in love with another person that's why he/she asking for freedom, this scenario should not be considered. As much as possible husband and wife need to stay together as what they promised when they get married. If divorced will be implemented here in our country, marriage is taken for granted and and it will be a come what may issue. I will marry him/her then, if things will not work out we will file a divorce later. In my opinion, the government needs to make a thorough research and survey if divorced should be legalize here in the Philippines.

There are already many worst incident happened because of the divorce issue and I read a terrible news about it the other day.

alsoyoutube · Jul 23, 2011

of course divorce isnt good but since its happening alot people think its ok
just like suicide is only relief for a "temporary" problem divorce is a relief of r a temporary problem

anjville · Jul 23, 2011

I don't want to mention if it is good or bad. But, according to my principles, marriage is a bond not only between man and woman but also to the Lord. Since, you promised yourself to be with your partner forever it would be illogical and injustice to break that bond through separation and eventually, divorce. Marriage is supposedly forever because it blossoms with love. The kind of love that withstands over time and through any obstacles the couples are facing or about to face.

It is true that Philippines has not legalized divorce because under Article 15 of Civil Codes it states that ALL Filipinos â€“ where they may be in the world â€“ are bound by Philippine laws on family rights and duties, status, condition, and legal capacity. With that law, we are also bound to our culture and moral values! I don't think that divorce is moral even though it is legal. Man are just trying to twist morality by making legal and logical reasoning about it. "Not all legal are moral..."

david15923 · Jul 23, 2011

To some it's a nightmare that has to end, and even for some children there is the case. If there isn't a divorce, there even might be agressions, and when a children is present to that, it messes up with the childrens "mind groth" (don't know if you spell it that way :S).

zzaaoo · Jul 23, 2011

divorce is bad or good it depends on the condition i thought. for the couple who not yet have children that a good way. because if the bad condition in "house" still continue, it can make unhealth relation for them. but, if we see from religious side, its a bad way. because everything have been made the Lord cant separated by the peoples.

jethro64 · Jul 23, 2011

i don't support divorce, why? Because marriage is holy, man and woman, two beings are united in the eyes of God they are one. But what is divorce? Its the permanent separation, it'll bring division.
'What God hath put together, nothing can separate it.'
divorce will only make a trial-and-error stage, hence you shouldn't enter marriage unless you do really love your partner, and is willing to do everything you can do just to save it.

Another problem with marriage is they just have it for formality, just to say their legally married.

zzaaoo · Jul 23, 2011

david15923 said:
To some it's a nightmare that has to end, and even for some children there is the case. If there isn't a divorce, there even might be agressions, and when a children is present to that, it messes up with the childrens "mind groth" (don't know if you spell it that way :S).

i agree with you mate.

flapiz · Jul 23, 2011

glen_mark_ledesma said:
Well here in the Philippines it is not been legalized or practice in our present government and many anti's are obstructing to make it happen. Do you really think that divorce can help or just worsen more the scenario for every broken families and marriage?

I think if the couple had no kids yet divorce is okay. Because a relationship without love would only lead to more hurt in the future. But if they have kids, they should reconsider because it's hard for kids to grow up without having both parents.

I think people should think hardly first before getting married to avoid this scenario.

belleangelbelle · Jul 23, 2011

If the relationship of the two married couple cannot be repair it is good to have divorce. What can they do if its really not working they will just gonna hurt each other and also what if one of them got the opportunity to migrate abroad for better life. Their visa will not be approved if they are separated and not divorced.

tanaselan · Jul 24, 2011

Divorce a actually a very bad thing and it will give a big effect in community
. For example , Did you ever think about the children's future when their parents are being divorced , They are still small and have emotional feelings and they are sensitive as well, this divorce might change them a lot by the aspect of feelings and their way they will react to it .

someday · Jul 24, 2011

glen_mark_ledesma said:
Well here in the Philippines it is not been legalized or practice in our present government and many anti's are obstructing to make it happen. Do you really think that divorce can help or just worsen more the scenario for every broken families and marriage?

i really don't think divorce is a good thing. people should avoid it as much as possible but if two person really think they can't spend their life together anymore they should do it as a last resort. But to be honest I really don't like divorce.

pinoycity · Jul 24, 2011

For me, anything that will undermine the stability of the family should be considered as bad thing. And divorce should be one of them. I admit that there are instances when a relationship is beyond repair but that does not make divorce a necessity, even, at these "modern" times. It will only shatter many families if we will make it easier to untie a relationship.

jazzme · Jul 24, 2011

glen_mark_ledesma said:
Well here in the Philippines it is not been legalized or practice in our present government and many anti's are obstructing to make it happen. Do you really think that divorce can help or just worsen more the scenario for every broken families and marriage?

for me in every situation has its own advantage and disadvantages.

I know the Bible said, the blessed and married in the church should not be separated by anyone.

but not all the time this can be use as an excuse.

khare1005 · Jul 24, 2011

divorce is an end of a married life which is never associated with happiness.children of a broken relationship have a very bad impact on their personality.being a single mother or a single father is never been so easy.moreover there are people in society which will always taunt you for this.

SarahXine · Jul 24, 2011

I think divorce is either good or bad based on the circumstances the couple in question are in.

Some people immediately arrive at the decision to divorce before considering other options. There are many couples who rashly decide to divorce and then realize that it's not a good idea and re-marry. Perhaps if they would have taken the time to sit down and think things through, they could have saved a lot of trouble.

However, I don't agree with not getting divorced simply for a child's sake. My parents stayed together because they thought it would be better for us. Instead, we just ended up having to hear them fight all the time and wished they would get divorced.

If the a couple with kids decide to stay together, they better know how to keep things in check. There's no point staying together if you're too focused on being unhappy with each other to even pay attention to your kids without being angry.

I think the bottom line is, whenever divorce becomes an issue, the couple should try to find out what the real problem is and whether it can be resolved. If it's really too difficult to work out, there's no point in staying together for any reason. Although, I suppose the most important thing is for people to take marriage seriously and not get hitched on some whim.

glen_mark_ledesma · Jul 25, 2011

I read a lot of post here and everybody's point of views are correct. But if we will base the reality why people come to think of divorce?

Just a quick review and let's see the reasons being detailed out according to the respondents:

Disadvantage:

1. Put marriage to an end. Can't be associated to happiness.
2. Broken families, bad impression on the minds of the children.
3. Immoral, jeopardize the stability of the family and community
4. Not a necessity coz according to Bible, a coupled being bind together can't be separated.
5. It won't happen if it was analyzed 100x before entering marriage
6. Marriage is holy and it will spoil the sanctity.

Advantage:
1. Better to end up marriage/relationship rather than to prolong the sacrifices.
2. To prevent any more serious complications that might affect childrens growth
3. Freedom from a nightmare marriage
4. To start a new life, bring new chapters for the sake of children and own life.
5. For migrating and employment reasons which requires a visa, divorce is a better way than separations as it might affect the approval.
6. A way to commence awareness of abuse, humiliation, physical injury and emotional distress to be put in consideration in our law for a better family.

any more opinions to add? so we can learn more things here about these topic? your opinions are highly appreciated!

Is divorce good or bad?

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