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[Writing] Satanic Diaries (1?)

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This is something I have been working on. It is basically supposed to writing from an acclaimed satanist. NOTE: I am NOT a satanist myself, I just find it interesting to write from the POV of others.
I may make this a continuous series if you guys like it and ask for more. Please leave feedback! Tell me what you think about it and whether or not you would like me to post more.
I also am not too sure about the title (Satanic Diaries). If you can think of anything better, please let me know.


Demons in disguise - Verbose’s Demon Side
I wish nothing but pain and suffering to my enemies in the after life. My suffering in this life will be honored in the next, for life isn't something I Live, rather something I endure for the promise of honoring my dark lord. Say what you will but life is pointless, why try to find meaning in the meaningless, why try to find light in the darkness, why try to find life in death. It’s all simply pointless, If our feelings, emotions and thoughts are influenced by complex functions in our brains are our feelings us, or are they just a result of said functions, if so when we take those functions out what’s left. Is this emotionless, thoughtless beast who we truly are, our inner demon, are we all just demons in disguise.                                                                                              


I've been a pacifist for about 2 years now, relinquished my vows a couple of weeks ago and have since been feeling the anger and power from my dark lord surging through me non-stop, at first it was sickening and I was hesitant but then it began to grow on me, with me being able to endure it longer. was it a mere coincidence that I stumbled upon the article that finally showed me my faith and made me question my(at the time) current state of atheism or did Lord Satan want to show me what I was, that I was hiding who I truly am, the beast within me, the beast that prefers solitude and the suffering of others. I've hated my life for a while I've been through a lot, some of this stuff my own friends don’t even know about, who the fuck are my friends anyways? These people who are my “friends“ are nothing more than pawns, use them and lose them that’s my motto, and the sick part of it all is that they don’t know this. In this sick world I have no friends, I don't hate these posers, nor do I love them, I just endure them, and cling on to them for hope or for my own social purposes. Their shitty jokes, their shitty personalities, I guess they're just shitty people. Do they even care about me? I’ve had the occasional thoughts of suicide, murder, massacres, but I still keep some of my pacifistic views(that and running and prison would be my life, unless I got away with the perfect murder a believable suicide, this gives me an idea.) And believe me I've seen lots of glimpses of hope, hope that everything will be alright, hope that people actually care about me. Believe it or not everything we do as humans has some sort of selfish reason.                                   


This is just a small piece of incomplete literature highlighting my thoughts, If you’d like to see more about me, my endeavors into satanism leave a response or fucking ask.
 

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Yeah stuff like that's weird though
 
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